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Subrip By PrimeEvil
Fixed By Pacman
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[Narrator]
There are gajillions ofstories...
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ofmischiefand fun,
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but to keep things simple,
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let's start withjust one...
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about a mom and two kids...
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and a house and a hat...
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that, oddly enough,
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was worn by a cat.
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But soon enough
we will get to all that.
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In the valley that stretches
from this hill to that hill,
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a city is nestled...
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that city is Anville.
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- [Kid] Hurry up!
We'll miss the movie!
- Any more tutti-frutti?
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I'll check.
Thanks!
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[NarratorContinues]
It's a town that's not huge,
but quite big enough...
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for buyers and sellers
to sell and buy stuff,
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from shoes and shirts...
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and elongated ladders...
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to sailboats and gibble-grated
berry-juice bladders.
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[Horn Honks]
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So ourstory begins
at the corner
ofMain and Montroob...
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in the spotless
real estate offiice...
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run by Hank Humberfloob.
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[Woman]
Humberfloob Real Estate. How can
we make yourdreams come true?
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[People Chattering]
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What do you mean,
you're leaving?
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You're a babysitter.
Babysitters don't leave. They sit.
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Baby-leavers leave.
I'm sorry. I really
gotta go, Miss Walden.
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Well, I need to come home
right away.
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All right.
Thank you, Amy.
Sorry.
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[Sighs]
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Attention, everyone!
It's 9:02.
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Staff meeting!
Staff meeting!
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[All Gasping, Murmuring]
Look alive, everyone.!
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First I'd like to
welcome aboard...
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our newest member
of the Humberfloob family,
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Jim McFlinnagan!
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- Mr. Humberfloob,
I wanted to thank you...
- [All Gasping]
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Fired.
I beg your pardon?
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Fired.
B-But l...
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Fired!
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One, two, three,
four, fiive, six, seven,
eight, nine, 10!
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As you know, tonight is
our bimonthly"meet and greet" party.
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Tonight's host is...
Joan Walden.
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This is where people can
meet our real estate agents...
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in an informal,
yet hygienic setting.
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Mr. Humberfloob,
I have to get home to my kids.
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Ah, yes.
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Your children.
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Joan, let me make this
perfectly clear.
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If your house
is as messy as last time,
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you're fiired!
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[Employees Gasping,
Murmuring]
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That's pretty clear,
Mr. Humberfloob.
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Don't worry. I promise.
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My kids'll be
on their best behavior.
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Great.
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[Phone Rings]
[Woman]
Humberfloob Real Estate.
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How can we make
yourdreams come true?
Please hold.
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[Narrator]
Lfyou leave Humberfloob's
and turn left onto Main,
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three miles down
you'll fiind Lipplapper Lane,
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a pleasant-enough street
in a pleasant-enough way...
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where a neighbor greeted neighbor
with a neighborly"Hey.!"
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Hey!
Hey!
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Here the hedges were hedged,
the weeds were all weeded,
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and lawns were mowed daily,
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twice daily ifneeded.
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And at the end
ofthis street,
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in a house like any other,
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something magical
would happen...
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to a sisterand her brother.
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[Barking]
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[Barks]
Shh! Nevins!
Stealth mode.
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Today's to-do list.
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Number one:
Make to-do list.
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Number two:
Practice coloring.
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Number three:
Research graduate schools.
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Number four:
Be spontaneous.
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Number fiive:
Create lasting
childhood memories.
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And numbersix:
Amend will.
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What is he doing?
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[Sighs]
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[Whines]
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[Beeps]
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Number 10:
Make tomorrow's to-do list.
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Ladies and gentlemen!
[Nevins Barking]
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Nevins,
your attention, please.
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You are about to witness
the third most spectacular stunt...
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ever performed
under this roof!
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Do you know how hard it's getting
to tell people that we're related?
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Relax.
I'll put everything back.
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[Whining]
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And now,
for the indoor stair luge!
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Indoor stair luge?
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I'll have to add this one
to my list.
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Go have no fun
somewhere else.
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It... is... showtime.!
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- [Whimpers]
- [Grunts]
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Whoa.!
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[Yelling]
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- Aah!
- Yeah!
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[Groans]
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- [Woman] Oh, my word.!
- [Nevins Barking]
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Nevins!
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Nevins, come back.!
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Hey, Mom. What's up?
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You are so lucky
you didn't ruin this dress.
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Mom, I know
you're angry,
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but there's something
you need to know.
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This was all Sally's fault.
Oh, really?
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And how, exactly,
was it Sally's fault?
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Give me a minute.
I'm workin' on it.
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Save it, Conrad.
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Why today? Why did you
have to pick today
to destroy the house?
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You know
what's happening today.
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I tried to tell him, Mom.
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"Mom's throwing
a very important party," I said.
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"All ofher important
clients will be here."
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But he went right ahead
and wrecked the house
and let Nevins get away.
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Now, again, I hope
you're going to ground him.
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Yes, Sally, for a week, but
that's none of your business.
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Aweek?
Come on. Two days.
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I asked you to do
one thing today, Conrad...
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keep the house
clean.
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Do you know how frustrating it is
that you're always doing
the exact opposite of what I say?
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Knock, knock, knock.
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[Growling]
Someone lose a dog?
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I found him next door...
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in my yard... again.
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You are a saint.
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And here I thought
you were only dating me
for my good looks.
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Lucky us.
Larry Quinn is here.
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Hey-a, sport.
Call me Lawrence.
Okay?
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You rescued Nevins!
Thanks, Lawrence!
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It was my pleasure, Sally.
Anything for my little princess.
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Oh, I don't wanna be a princess.
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In a constitutional monarchy
parliament has all the real power.
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I see.
Okay, that's great.
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Uh, look, pal, be a sport.
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Why don't you go
tidy up the living room.
Okay...dude?
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I don't have to listen to you, Larry.
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Conrad,
do what Lawrence says.
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Have you given some thought
about the Wilhelm Academy?
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You mean the Colonel Wilhelm
Military Academy forTroubled Youth?
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That's the one, Joan.
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I'm not sure
it's right for Conrad.
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Oh, Joan, Joan.
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Joan, Joan, Joan.
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I have so much respect
foryou, Joan.
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Single mother, careerwoman,
raising two children on your own,
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and still fiinding time
to be the best darned
real estate agent in town.
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I know how hard it is, Joan.
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It is hard.
Oh... I know.
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And I know
how hard you're trying.
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This is a once-in-a-lifetime
proposition,
and you must act now.
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The Colonel Wilhelm
Military Academy
forTroubled Youth...
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is what we call in the sales game
a win-win scenario.
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A top-flight military school,
and it's only... eight hours away.
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[Phone Rings]
Oh, the phone.
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[Phone Rings]
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I heard what you said.
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I'm not going to military school, Larry.
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Look, buddy,
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I know I'm not your dad...
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and this is probably
really strange foryou...
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your neighbor's
dating your mom.
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But here's the thing, son.
Come here.
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I don't like you either.
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But I'm gonna
marry your mom.
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And if it was up to me,
you'd be at military school today.
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I'm not going
to military school.
Ohh!
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I think you're gonna love it.
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It's just like summer camp,
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except with brutal forced marches...
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and soul-crushing discipline.
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And one more thing...
It's Lawrence,
you snot-nosed son of a...
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wonderful woman
who I'm absolutely crazy about!
[Grunting] Oww!
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Gosh, I love children!
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Oh, Joan,
I didn't see you there.
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Would you be a doll
and help me bring up chairs
from the basement?
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Nothing would give me
more pleasure, Joan,
but I do have to run.
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I have a very important
sales conference downtown.
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Oh. Okay.
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- Well, I'll see you at the party tonight.
- Sure.
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Mom, that guy's a total phony.
You can't let Larry...
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It's Lawrence, Conrad.
[Doorbell Rings]
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Kate's Catering.
I'm here to do your party tonight.
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Oh, hi.
Where's Kate?
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I'm Kate.
Oh. Okay.
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Right this way, Kate.
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Mom, you've gotta
listen to me...
[Phone Ringing]
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Quiet!
Two weeks ago
you said you would...
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[Joan Screams]
I "specialed" it.
See?
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Quiet!
Nevins!
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[Ringing Continues]
I said quiet!
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00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,700
[Ringing]
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00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:06,900
Joan Walden Real Estate.
Be it ever so humble,
there's no place likeJoan.
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00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,100
This is Mr. Humberfloob.
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00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:13,000
- Oh, hi, Mr. Humberfloob.
- Joan, I need you to come back to the offiice.
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00:12:13,100 --> 00:12:15,400
- Today?
- Yes, Joan.
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00:12:15,500 --> 00:12:18,100
- No problem?
- No problem at all.
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Great!
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00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,600
- [Gasps]
- What's going on, Mommy?
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00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:26,500
Mommy has to go
back to the offiice.
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00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:29,300
Oh! I hope Mrs. Kwan
can babysit.
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00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,000
- Not Mrs. Kwan!
- [Doorbell Rings]
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Oh!
Hi, Mrs. Kwan.
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00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:38,200
Hi.
I'm running late.
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Thanks for babysitting
on such short notice.
Mmm, yeah.
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Okay, Mrs. Kwan.
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00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:44,800
Oh-oh-oh!
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00:12:44,900 --> 00:12:47,600
I'll be back
in a couple ofhours.
Hi.
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00:12:47,700 --> 00:12:50,300
Conrad's grounded,
so no video games.
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00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:52,400
Sally?
Last chance.
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00:12:52,500 --> 00:12:55,500
If you wanna make cupcakes,
I can take you to
your friend Ginny's house.
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00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:57,500
- [Growling]
- Ginny's not my friend anymore.
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00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,300
Last time we made cupcakes
she wanted to be the head chef.
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00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,300
I'm the head chef.
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00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:04,100
What about Denise, then?
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00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:07,000
She talked back to me,
so I ordered her
not to speak to me anymore.
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00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:10,200
- And you don't like bossy?
- I won't tolerate it.
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00:13:10,300 --> 00:13:11,900
Right.
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00:13:11,900 --> 00:13:14,800
Well, if you're both staying,
remember the rules.
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Conrad: No playing ball
in the house, no fiighting,
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00:13:18,100 --> 00:13:20,000
no answering the phone,
"City morgue."
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00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:22,000
Mommy,
can't I have some rules?
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00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:25,600
No chewing tobacco.
229
00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:27,700
Thanks, Mom.
You have my word.
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00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:33,100
And absolutely no one
sets foot in the living room, or else.
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00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:36,800
Orelse what?
You're gonna do what Larry said
and send me to military school?
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Maybe if you'd just behave,
I wouldn't have to consider military school.
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I wish I could trust you.
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00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:46,000
I wish I had a different mom.
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00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:49,500
Well, sometimes
I wish the same thing.
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00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,600
[DoorOpens]
237
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,500
[DoorSlams]
238
00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:07,400
Mmm.
239
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,200
Good luck with your meeting.
240
00:14:24,800 --> 00:14:26,000
[Car DoorCloses]
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00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:32,600
[Grunting]
242
00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:41,800
Children, would you like
to watch television with me?
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00:14:41,900 --> 00:14:46,300
- We don't have to tell your mother.
- [TV: Channel Changing]
244
00:14:46,400 --> 00:14:49,500
- [Speaking Chinese]
- [Yelling]
245
00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:56,800
[Together]
Taiwanese parliament.
[TV: Yelling, Blows Landing]
246
00:14:56,900 --> 00:15:00,600
You tell them, Kwi-Chang!
No more big government!
[TV: Karate Yells]
247
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,500
Rip his heart out.!
248
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,600
[TV: Blows Landing,
Yelling Continue]
249
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:12,100
[Snoring]
250
00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:14,400
[Whimpers]
251
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:17,700
Hit me!
[Sighs]
252
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:22,400
[Narrator]
So they slumped in theirchairs,
253
00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:24,600
too glum to complain,
254
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:28,200
and to make matters worse,
it started to rain.
255
00:15:28,300 --> 00:15:30,500
[Butterfly Yelps]
256
00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:33,500
They sat in the house...
257
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,000
on that cold, cold, wet day...
258
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:38,100
with no fun to have...
259
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:40,100
and no games to play.
260
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,200
They couldjust
stare out the window...
261
00:15:42,300 --> 00:15:44,500
or perhaps get a nap in,
262
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,800
and hope that something,
263
00:15:46,900 --> 00:15:48,800
anything might happen.
264
00:15:48,900 --> 00:15:50,500
Quit bothering
the fiish.
265
00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:53,000
I know.
Quit bothering the fiish.
266
00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:54,500
Spit hand!
Oh, gross!
267
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:59,000
Get that away from me!
Get it away!
268
00:15:59,100 --> 00:16:01,600
[Loud Bump]
[Narrator]
Then something went bump.
269
00:16:01,700 --> 00:16:03,500
- What was that?
- [Barks]
270
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:06,900
How that bump
made themjump.
[Nevins Continues Barking]
271
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:10,200
[Loud Bumping Continues]
I think it came
from the closet.
272
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,100
[Loud Crash]
273
00:16:38,900 --> 00:16:40,800
[Grunts]
274
00:16:41,900 --> 00:16:43,800
Conrad?
275
00:16:43,900 --> 00:16:46,200
Conrad.
276
00:16:47,300 --> 00:16:49,800
Come on, Conrad.
277
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,000
[Screams]
278
00:16:52,100 --> 00:16:53,900
[Laughing]
279
00:16:55,300 --> 00:16:57,200
You shouldn't scare people.
280
00:16:57,300 --> 00:17:00,300
You should've seen
the look on your face.
It was like you saw a monster...
281
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,700
A monster? Where?
282
00:17:04,700 --> 00:17:08,000
That could've gone better.
[Wheezing Laugh]
283
00:17:08,100 --> 00:17:11,100
[Both Screaming]
284
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,600
[Sally]
What was that?
[Conrad] I don't know.
285
00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:17,900
Looked like
a humongous cat.
286
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:20,200
"Humongous"?
287
00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:23,800
I prefer the term "big-boned" or"jolly."
Now, what are we hiding from?
288
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,600
[Chortling]
289
00:17:25,700 --> 00:17:27,600
[Both Screaming]
290
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:34,900
Thatwas a giant cat.
291
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:36,900
But that's impossible,
isn't it?
292
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:38,900
It's entirely
impossible.
293
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,400
You know,
I like this hiding place
a lot better.
294
00:17:41,500 --> 00:17:43,900
They'll never
fiind us here.
295
00:17:45,300 --> 00:17:47,200
Scream and run.
296
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:49,700
[Both Screaming]
And there they go.
297
00:17:52,900 --> 00:17:54,300
Who are you?
298
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,400
Who? Me?
299
00:17:56,600 --> 00:18:00,800
Why, I'm the Cat in the Hat.
There's no doubt about that.
300
00:18:00,900 --> 00:18:03,300
I'm a "super-fun-diferous" feline...
301
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:06,000
who's here to make sure
that you're...
302
00:18:07,900 --> 00:18:11,600
Meeline? Key lime?
303
00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:14,600
Turpentine?
304
00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:16,600
I got nothin'.
305
00:18:16,700 --> 00:18:20,100
I'm not so good with the rhyming.
Not really, no.
306
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:23,800
Look, I'm a cat
that can talk.
307
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:27,400
That should be enough
foryou people!
[Muttering]
308
00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:30,200
I can talk.!
I'm a cat.! Yes.!
[Chortling]
309
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,100
Where did you come from?
310
00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:35,700
Hmm, how do I put this?
311
00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:40,200
When a mommy cat and a daddy cat
love each othervery much,
312
00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:42,200
they decide that...
313
00:18:42,300 --> 00:18:45,700
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Where did you come from?
314
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:48,600
My place!
Where do you think?
[Snickering]
315
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:51,800
No, how did you get here?
316
00:18:51,900 --> 00:18:53,800
I drove!
317
00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:57,800
Look, I've been here two whole minutes,
and no one has offered me a drink.
318
00:18:57,900 --> 00:18:59,300
Harumph!
319
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:04,100
- Sorry, Mr. Cat.
Would you like some milk?
- Milk? Ecch! No!
320
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:07,800
Lactose intolerant.
Gums up the works. Oy.
321
00:19:07,900 --> 00:19:10,100
You'll thank me later.
322
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,800
[Wheezing, Chortling]
323
00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:15,300
- [Singer Laughing]
Wipeout.!
- Hello!
324
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:18,700
@�@�[SurfRock]
Surf s up!
[Chuckles] Yeah!
325
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,800
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Yee-hee-hee!
326
00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:28,500
Nice spread you got here.
327
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:31,000
Homina-homina-homina-homina!
328
00:19:31,100 --> 00:19:33,100
Who is this?
329
00:19:34,900 --> 00:19:36,800
Ohh!
330
00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:39,800
That's my mom.
331
00:19:39,900 --> 00:19:41,400
Awkward, yeah.
332
00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:44,800
Yes, this place will do
quite nicely, actually. Yeah.
333
00:19:44,900 --> 00:19:47,500
Although those drapes
are a train wreck.
334
00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:49,500
[Chortling]
335
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:53,000
[Snoring]
And this is the lumpiest couch
I ever sat on.
336
00:19:53,100 --> 00:19:56,200
Who is this dreadfully
uncomfortable woman?
337
00:19:56,300 --> 00:19:58,700
Get offher.
That's our babysitter.
338
00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:00,700
What the... Babysitter?
339
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:03,500
You don't need one of those,
do ya?
340
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:10,800
Let me get this straight.
341
00:20:10,900 --> 00:20:13,100
You pay this woman...
342
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,100
to sit on babies?
343
00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:17,200
That's disgusting!
344
00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:21,600
I'd do it for nothing!
[Laughing Loudly]
345
00:20:21,700 --> 00:20:23,700
Hmm!
346
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:29,400
Now, let's see
what the old "phunometer"
has to say.
347
00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:32,100
- "Phunometer"?
- Yeah. It measures
how fun you are.
348
00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:34,400
[Chortling]
349
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:40,600
Hi.
350
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:43,900
[Bell Dings]
Huh?
351
00:20:46,300 --> 00:20:48,400
Ohh.
352
00:20:50,700 --> 00:20:53,600
Ah. Control freak.
Yeah.
353
00:20:53,700 --> 00:20:56,300
Now you.
354
00:20:57,700 --> 00:20:59,600
[Whispers]
Hi. How are ya?
355
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:01,500
- [Bell Dings]
- Whoa!
356
00:21:05,400 --> 00:21:07,900
[Whimpering]
357
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,900
Oh.
358
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,800
Tap it.
359
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,400
Listen, kid,
you can tap it with a hammer,
360
00:21:15,500 --> 00:21:17,400
it ain't gonna change.
361
00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:19,700
Just as I suspected.
362
00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:24,400
You guys are both out of whack.
You're a control freak,
and you're a rule-breaker.
363
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:27,700
That'll be $700.
Who's your insurance carrier?
364
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:31,200
- So, what do we do?
- Well, there are two treatments
I'd recommend.
365
00:21:31,300 --> 00:21:35,100
One is a series of painful shots
injected into your abdomen and kneecap.
366
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:36,900
And the other...
367
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,600
involves a musical number!
368
00:21:39,700 --> 00:21:42,100
@�@�[Orchestra:Fanfare]
@ Me-Me-Me-Meow @
369
00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:43,800
How many shots?
370
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:47,500
[Wheezing]
"How many shots?"
Aren't you precious?
371
00:21:48,300 --> 00:21:51,200
[Gasps]
372
00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,600
Maestro!
@�@�[Orchestra:Introduction]
373
00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:05,400
@ I know it is wet @
374
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:08,200
@ And the sun is not sunny @
[Thunderclap]
375
00:22:08,900 --> 00:22:13,200
@ But we can have lots of
good fun that is funny @
376
00:22:13,300 --> 00:22:14,700
[Both Groan]
377
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,300
@ It's fun to have fun @
378
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:22,000
@ But you got to know how @
379
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:24,100
[Gagging]
380
00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:26,500
- [Vomits, Liquid Splatters]
- [Both Gasp, Groan]
381
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:28,500
Hair ball.
382
00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:34,600
@ I know lots of good tricks
and I'll... @
383
00:22:34,700 --> 00:22:36,300
Stop this right now.!
Huh?
384
00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,600
- Who said that?
- Me!
385
00:22:38,700 --> 00:22:40,100
Remember? The fiish?
386
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:43,700
Came home in a Baggie,
loved me for two weeks, and then nothing!
387
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,300
- The fiish is talking!
- Well, sure, he can talk.
388
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:49,500
But is he saying anything?
No, not really. No.
389
00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:51,500
[Fish]
Hey, Socks, can it.!
390
00:22:51,700 --> 00:22:53,500
This cat should not be here.
He should not be about.
391
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:55,400
He should not be here
when your mother is out.
392
00:22:55,500 --> 00:22:59,200
Come on, kids!
You gonna listen to him?
He drinks where he pees!
393
00:23:02,500 --> 00:23:05,500
@�@�[Salsa]
394
00:23:07,900 --> 00:23:10,600
@There was this cat I knew
back home where I was bred @
395
00:23:10,700 --> 00:23:13,600
@ He never listened to
a single thing his mother said @
396
00:23:13,700 --> 00:23:16,300
@�He never used the litter box
He made a mess in the hall @�
397
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:17,700
@That's why they sent him
to a vet @
398
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:20,300
@To cut offboth his ba... @
399
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:22,400
ba... ba...
400
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:25,700
@ Boy, that wasn't
fun, fun, fun @
401
00:23:25,900 --> 00:23:29,600
@ He never learns
You can have fun, fun, fun @
But less is more!
402
00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:32,800
@They may ship you off to school
so rein it in a little @
403
00:23:32,900 --> 00:23:34,900
@ We can't spell "fun"
without "U" in the middle @
404
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:39,800
Human, this cat is currently in violation
of... 17 ofyour mother's rules.!
405
00:23:39,900 --> 00:23:41,100
[Rings]
City morgue!
406
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:43,300
- Eighteen!
- [Laughing]
407
00:23:44,500 --> 00:23:47,600
[Crowd Cheering,
Applauding]
408
00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:51,500
- Ol�!
- [Bull Growling]
409
00:23:51,600 --> 00:23:53,300
Ooh!
410
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:55,600
[Screaming]
411
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:02,500
@ You can juggle work and play
but you have to know the way @
412
00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:05,400
@ You can keep afloat a wish
like the way I do this fiish @
413
00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:08,000
@� You can be a happy fella
Someone throw me that umbrella @�
414
00:24:08,100 --> 00:24:10,800
@ And that rake, that cake
Life's what you make it @
415
00:24:10,900 --> 00:24:12,700
@ So have fun, fun, fun @
416
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:15,600
@ Go insane and have
some fun, fun, fun @
417
00:24:15,700 --> 00:24:18,400
@Just look at me
Fun, fun, fun @
418
00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:21,200
@ No more rain
Look, it's the sun, sun, sun @
419
00:24:21,300 --> 00:24:25,100
@ So can't you see
I'm as happy as a clam
I'm as fiit as a fiiddle @
420
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:27,000
@ Yeah, the dogs
may bark about you @
421
00:24:27,100 --> 00:24:28,600
@ And the purebred chaps
may doubt you @
422
00:24:28,700 --> 00:24:30,600
[Fish]
Getting motion sickness.!
423
00:24:30,700 --> 00:24:33,400
Milk? Big mistake.
424
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:36,100
@ But remember this
You can't have fun without "U" @
425
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:38,100
I can't breathe!
Ohh!
426
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:40,600
Whoa!
427
00:24:40,700 --> 00:24:44,400
I knew that milk would
come back to haunt me.
Help! Help!
428
00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:47,700
- [Loud Burp]
- [Groaning]
429
00:24:48,900 --> 00:24:51,500
[Yelling]
430
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:53,700
[Grunting]
431
00:24:53,800 --> 00:25:00,000
@"U" in the middle @@
432
00:25:00,100 --> 00:25:01,800
[Gulps]
433
00:25:01,900 --> 00:25:03,700
[Panting, Chuckling]
434
00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:06,200
- Bravo, Cat.
- Huh?
435
00:25:06,300 --> 00:25:09,400
These children are smart enough
not to fall foryour MTV-style flash...
436
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:11,500
at the expense of content
and moral values.
437
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:14,300
That was wicked cool!
Do it again!
438
00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:18,000
I'd love to, but Shamu is right...
I really should be going.
439
00:25:18,100 --> 00:25:20,700
- No, don't go!
- No, I should go.
440
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:23,700
I should let you and the fiish
have all your fun conjugating verbs,
441
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:26,100
cleaning your room,
doing long division.
442
00:25:26,100 --> 00:25:28,700
No, you have to stay!
443
00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:31,300
All right, I'll stay.
Oh, yeah!
[Conrad] Yeah.!
444
00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:34,300
But if I'm gonna stay,
there's something I wanna show you.
445
00:25:35,100 --> 00:25:37,000
Something magical...
446
00:25:37,100 --> 00:25:39,700
and full of wonder.
447
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:44,700
- It's called a contract.
- You want us to sign this?
448
00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:47,800
- Just a formality, really. Yeah.
- Who are they?
449
00:25:49,500 --> 00:25:52,700
Magical time-traveling elves.
450
00:25:52,800 --> 00:25:56,200
[Chortling]
Yeah. Magic.
451
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,700
Okay, they're my lawyers.
452
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,700
Liability issues, litigious society,
frivolous lawsuits.
453
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:05,300
You understand.
454
00:26:05,300 --> 00:26:08,500
Basically, this contract guarantees
you can have all the fun you want...
455
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,800
and nothing bad's
ever gonna happen.
456
00:26:11,100 --> 00:26:13,100
- All the fun we want?
- Uh-yeah!
457
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,400
- Nothing bad will happen?
- Uh-no!
458
00:26:15,500 --> 00:26:19,800
Come on, Sal,
for once in your life
try something spontaneous.
459
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:26,000
It goes against
my better instincts, but...
460
00:26:26,100 --> 00:26:27,800
fiine.
461
00:26:27,900 --> 00:26:30,000
Beautiful.
Initial here.
462
00:26:30,100 --> 00:26:32,300
And here. And here.
463
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:34,300
Not here!
464
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:36,000
[Wheezes]
465
00:26:36,100 --> 00:26:37,600
Turn it over.
466
00:26:37,700 --> 00:26:39,700
This is nothing.
467
00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:42,000
[Clears Throat]
Scratch this.
468
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:43,600
Smell that!
Terrifiic.
469
00:26:43,700 --> 00:26:45,700
Yadee-yadee-yadee.
470
00:26:45,700 --> 00:26:48,700
Sign the bottom.
[Pencil Scratching On Paper]
471
00:26:48,900 --> 00:26:50,900
You're it!
Okay, gimme fiive!
472
00:26:53,900 --> 00:26:56,200
Four.
473
00:26:56,300 --> 00:26:58,200
[Chortling]
474
00:26:58,300 --> 00:26:59,500
Let's get this party
started! Uh-huh!
475
00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:03,900
Hey, check out this room!
[Laughing]
476
00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:05,900
What now?
477
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:08,900
Mom says we're not
allowed in the living room
today, or else.
478
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:12,400
She's worried we'll mess up the couches
byjumpin'on 'em orsomethin;
479
00:27:12,500 --> 00:27:15,900
And she's right.
You can't jump on these.
480
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:19,500
Not like this.
They need some adjustment.
Yee-haw!
481
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:21,900
[Chuckling]
482
00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:25,200
Let's take a look
under the hood.
483
00:27:25,300 --> 00:27:28,200
[Spits] Yeah.
[Chuckles]
484
00:27:28,300 --> 00:27:30,600
Just doin' my job.
[Fart]
485
00:27:30,700 --> 00:27:32,600
Sorry.
What have we got here?
486
00:27:32,700 --> 00:27:34,800
Whew.
487
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,500
Here we go.
[Chortles]
488
00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:42,200
It's oversized.
That's unusual.
489
00:27:42,300 --> 00:27:44,200
Here it is.
[Grunts]
490
00:27:44,300 --> 00:27:45,400
[Elephant Trumpets]
491
00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:49,200
Down, Simba!
Down, Simba!
Get outta here!
492
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,700
Spray me, would ya?
You...
493
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:55,200
[Whimpering]
[Trumpeting Continues]
494
00:27:55,300 --> 00:27:57,500
[Choking]
495
00:28:00,300 --> 00:28:02,200
[Blows Landing]
[Elephant Whimpering]
496
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:05,300
[Panting]
497
00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:09,000
- [Elephant Trumpets]
- Thanks for the help.
498
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:13,400
Back in a second.
Who's your couch mechanic?
499
00:28:13,500 --> 00:28:16,100
You oughta call
Mr. Catwrench.
500
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:19,300
[Grinding, Rumbling]
Oww! My fur!
My fur! My fur!
501
00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:22,000
[Groaning, Shouting]
502
00:28:24,300 --> 00:28:27,700
That oughta do it.
Whoo!
503
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:30,900
[Chortling]
504
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,000
[Laughing]
505
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:43,700
Come on, kids.
I could use a little company.
506
00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:45,700
What about Mom's party?
507
00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:47,900
What about it?
We signed the contract.
508
00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:51,300
Wha-hoo!
[Laughing] Yeah!
509
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:54,300
One cushion left,
Sally.
510
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:57,300
She'll never do it.
She doesn't know
how to have fun.
511
00:28:57,400 --> 00:29:01,700
Fun? Sally,
you're betterthan fun.
Fun is beneath you.
512
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:03,300
Remember
what your mother told you...
513
00:29:03,300 --> 00:29:06,300
No one sets foot
in the living room...
[Conrad Shouting]
514
00:29:06,300 --> 00:29:08,900
You know what?
Let's just watch some flashbacks.
515
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:13,900
[Voice Slowed Down]
Absolutely no one sets foot
in the living room, or else.
516
00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:17,300
You're fiired... fiired... fiired...
517
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:20,200
fiired... fiired... fiired...
518
00:29:20,300 --> 00:29:24,400
[Takes Deep Breath]
Fiired... fiired... fiired... fiired...
519
00:29:24,500 --> 00:29:26,700
And that's why...
[Groans]
520
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:28,200
Oww!
521
00:29:29,700 --> 00:29:32,400
This is where
they buried my brother.!
522
00:29:32,500 --> 00:29:34,000
[Cat Laughing]
[Conrad]
Yeah.!
523
00:29:34,100 --> 00:29:36,700
[All Laughing]
Yippee!
Oh, yeah!
524
00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:40,100
This is amazing!
Like being
in the circus!
525
00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:42,100
Yeah, but without
those tortured animals...
526
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:44,600
or drunken clowns
that have hepatitis.
527
00:29:44,700 --> 00:29:47,300
See, kids, I told you
we could have fun!
528
00:29:47,400 --> 00:29:50,900
[Laughing Continues]
[Conrad] The best thing is,
no one will ever...
529
00:29:51,900 --> 00:29:53,800
know.
530
00:29:53,900 --> 00:29:57,300
Judas Priest!
I can't believe what I'm seeing!
531
00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:01,800
Oh, Mr. Quinn,
I was just telling Conrad
to get off the couch.
532
00:30:01,900 --> 00:30:03,800
Bad, Conrad!
Bad!
533
00:30:03,900 --> 00:30:05,800
Sally,
534
00:30:05,900 --> 00:30:07,700
baby, angel, princess,
535
00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:12,600
I'm gonna let you in
on a little secret, okay?
536
00:30:12,700 --> 00:30:14,900
Nobody likes a suck-up!
537
00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:20,300
[Quinn Laughing]
538
00:30:25,500 --> 00:30:28,000
Where's the cat?
I don't know.
539
00:30:31,900 --> 00:30:34,900
[Burps]
Ohh!
540
00:30:35,100 --> 00:30:37,000
Good bread.
541
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:40,800
What are you two
lookin' at?
542
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:49,400
[Sneezing]
543
00:30:49,500 --> 00:30:51,400
Is there a cat in here?
544
00:30:51,500 --> 00:30:53,500
[Sneezing Continues]
545
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:56,100
I'm gonna...
You're gonna...
546
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,900
I have to...
[Sneezes]
547
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,200
[Sneezes]
Get out ofhere.
548
00:31:02,300 --> 00:31:04,200
[Sneezes Twice]
549
00:31:04,300 --> 00:31:06,200
[Both Laughing]
550
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:11,200
See, kids, I told you.
Stick with me, it'll all work out.
551
00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:14,900
[Sneezes]
Oh, no! Ohh!
[Chortling]
552
00:31:15,100 --> 00:31:18,700
Little-known fact...
cats always land on their tushy.
553
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:22,200
- I thought they always
landed on their feet.
- Oh, sure, now you tell me.
554
00:31:22,300 --> 00:31:23,200
Harumph!
[Chortling]
555
00:31:24,500 --> 00:31:27,700
- So, kiddo, what do you
want to do for fun?
- I wanna make cupcakes!
556
00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:31,100
Cupcakes? Oh, yeah!
[Chortling]
To the kitchen!
557
00:31:31,200 --> 00:31:32,800
[Announcer]
Live from the kitchen,
558
00:31:32,900 --> 00:31:35,700
the following is
a paid commercial announcement
forAstounding Products.
559
00:31:35,700 --> 00:31:38,100
Hi! Welcome to
Astounding Products.
560
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:41,300
[Laughing]
561
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,300
I'm your host,
the guy in the sweaterwho asks
all the obvious questions.
562
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:45,800
[Studio Audience
Laughing]
563
00:31:45,900 --> 00:31:50,300
Now, here to tell us
about his astounding product
for making cupcakes,
564
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:53,400
all the way
from Cheshire, England,
please welcome...
565
00:31:53,500 --> 00:31:55,800
Me! Hello!
[Chuckling]
566
00:31:55,900 --> 00:31:59,600
Now... Hello!
I'm so excited!
567
00:31:59,700 --> 00:32:01,600
Do you love
making cupcakes,
568
00:32:01,700 --> 00:32:04,200
but hate all
the hard cupcake work?
569
00:32:04,300 --> 00:32:06,200
I know I do!
570
00:32:06,300 --> 00:32:09,500
Well, forget
everything you know
about making cupcakes...
571
00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:11,600
and say hello...
572
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:14,900
to the amazing Kupkake-inator.
573
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,800
- I'm so excited!
- [Audience Chuckling]
574
00:32:17,900 --> 00:32:19,900
Cupcake-a-what?
575
00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:21,900
[Cat, Audience]
Kupkake-inator!
576
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:25,600
Oh, this amazing device
can instantly make cupcakes...
577
00:32:25,700 --> 00:32:28,100
out of anything that
you have in the kitchen.
578
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:31,000
- Wait a minute.
Did you say"anything"?
- Anything.
579
00:32:31,100 --> 00:32:33,000
Anything?
Yes, anything.
580
00:32:33,100 --> 00:32:35,700
Anything?
Anything.
581
00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:39,200
- Anything?
- I'll get you, and it'll look
like a bloody accident.
582
00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:41,200
- [Audience Tittering]
- Anything.
583
00:32:41,300 --> 00:32:44,200
Now, take off the lid.
You can put in, I don't know,
a carton of eggs.
584
00:32:44,300 --> 00:32:46,700
What?
How about
a pack ofhot dogs?
585
00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:48,700
That's incredible!
Why not some ketchup?
586
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:51,100
Yeah, why not?
How about...
I know what you're thinkin'.
587
00:32:51,300 --> 00:32:53,700
Even a fiire extinguisher.
There we go.
588
00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:55,700
Hmm?
589
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:58,500
Now, close the lid
and Bob's your flippin' uncle!
590
00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:00,400
What an
astounding product!
591
00:33:00,500 --> 00:33:02,000
[Audience Applauding]
Oh, yeah!
592
00:33:02,100 --> 00:33:04,900
Open the drawer,
[Bell Dings,
Motor Whirring]
593
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:08,700
Fiill the patented
Kupkake-inator tray,
[Audience Gasping]
594
00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,600
- Close the drawer,
- [Audience Continues Gasping]
595
00:33:11,700 --> 00:33:14,900
Then place it
in a conventional oven.
596
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:17,200
[Audience Laughing,
Applauding]
597
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,000
Delicious cupcakes
are just minutes away.
598
00:33:22,100 --> 00:33:24,000
Did you just say
"minutes away"?
599
00:33:24,100 --> 00:33:25,700
[Host, Audience]
That's impossible!
600
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:29,000
You're not just wrong,
you're stupid.
Now, wait just a minute...
601
00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:31,100
And you're ugly,
just like your mum.
602
00:33:31,300 --> 00:33:33,700
[Audience Gasping]
Did you just call
my mother ugly?
603
00:33:33,900 --> 00:33:36,400
Shut up! I mean it!
I will end you!
604
00:33:36,500 --> 00:33:38,400
- [Grunts]
- [Audience, Cat Gasping, Groaning]
605
00:33:38,500 --> 00:33:41,100
Um, Cat.
Your tail.
606
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:43,800
What about it?
607
00:33:43,900 --> 00:33:48,300
Oh, I see! I've chopped it off.
That's interesting, because...
608
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:52,800
Son of a bi...
[Beep]
609
00:33:52,900 --> 00:33:55,600
@�@�[Whistling
"The Girl From Ipanema"]
610
00:33:55,700 --> 00:33:58,600
Look, I'm not saying
we're going to sue.
611
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,000
I'm just saying
we have a case.
612
00:34:01,100 --> 00:34:03,000
We'll talk later.
Lxnay, ixnay.
613
00:34:03,100 --> 00:34:05,400
[Wheezes]
Hi.
614
00:34:05,500 --> 00:34:08,100
Cat, is the oven
supposed to be
making that sound?
615
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:10,100
Huh?
616
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:13,400
Of course. That means
they're almost done, Conrack.
617
00:34:13,500 --> 00:34:15,600
- Conrad.
- That's what I said, Condor.
618
00:34:15,700 --> 00:34:18,200
- Cat!
- Now, that's my name!
619
00:34:18,300 --> 00:34:21,800
[Oven Whirring, Rumbling]
620
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:28,100
[Timer Bell Dings]
Yep!
621
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,100
They're done!
622
00:34:30,300 --> 00:34:32,700
Oh, man!
There's nothing
to worry about.
623
00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:34,700
I'm sure
they still taste fiine.
624
00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:36,700
Yecch!
They're horrible!
625
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:40,000
Who wants some?
Come on, come on!
[Chortling]
626
00:34:41,100 --> 00:34:43,000
Oh... my... cod.
627
00:34:43,100 --> 00:34:44,500
Ohh! Aah!
628
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:47,500
Cat, you need to
clean this mess up pronto.
629
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:50,800
We have a contract.
All right, I'll try.
630
00:34:52,300 --> 00:34:55,000
You don't try. You do.
631
00:34:55,100 --> 00:34:58,000
Yes, ma'am.
Right away, ma'am.
632
00:34:58,100 --> 00:35:00,800
[Coughs]
I'll be right back.
633
00:35:00,900 --> 00:35:02,700
Whoa!
[Crash]
634
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:04,600
[Chortling]
635
00:35:05,900 --> 00:35:08,200
[Snoring]
Hi.
How are ya?
636
00:35:08,300 --> 00:35:10,300
Okay.
[Chortling]
637
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:15,600
Look. I'm a girl.
638
00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:19,200
[Giggling, Purring]
639
00:35:19,300 --> 00:35:21,400
Stop! That's...
640
00:35:21,500 --> 00:35:23,100
[Together]
Mom's dress!
641
00:35:23,200 --> 00:35:26,600
[Gasps]
This fiilthy thing?
642
00:35:26,700 --> 00:35:28,800
She was gonna wear that tonight,
and you ruined it.
643
00:35:28,900 --> 00:35:31,900
Honey, it was ruined
when she bought it.
644
00:35:33,100 --> 00:35:35,000
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
645
00:35:35,100 --> 00:35:38,000
I told you
all this would happen.!
646
00:35:38,100 --> 00:35:41,100
- But no one listens to a fiish!
- Oy.
647
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,800
A dog goes "woof-woof"
and everybody knows that
little Timmy's trapped undera log.
648
00:35:43,900 --> 00:35:45,700
But a fiish speaks
in plain English...
649
00:35:45,900 --> 00:35:46,500
All right, everyone,
let's just take a deep breath
and calm down.
650
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,500
[Inhaling, Exhaling]
651
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:56,200
You know who's gonna solve it?
Me. I am.
652
00:35:56,300 --> 00:35:59,200
I will personally
take care of everything.
653
00:36:00,500 --> 00:36:02,400
And I know
just the guys to do it.
654
00:36:02,500 --> 00:36:04,500
[Wheezing]
655
00:36:07,900 --> 00:36:09,900
[Chortling]
656
00:36:16,100 --> 00:36:19,700
In this box are two Things.
I will show them to you.
657
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:24,000
Two Things, and I call them
Thing One and Thing Two.
658
00:36:24,100 --> 00:36:27,500
These Things will not bite you.
They want to have fun.
659
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,700
So without further ado,
660
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:33,100
meet Thing Two
and Thing One!
661
00:36:33,200 --> 00:36:35,500
[Whooping, Babbling]
662
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:37,500
@Ta-da @
663
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:40,400
Oh, yeah!
[Chortles]
664
00:36:40,500 --> 00:36:43,600
Thing One, Conrad, Sally.
Conrad, Sally, Thing One.
665
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:45,700
Thing Two, Conrad, Sally.
Conrad, Sally, Thing Two.
666
00:36:45,900 --> 00:36:49,000
Thing One, Thing Two.
Thing Two, Thing One.
Conrad, Sally. Sally, Conrad.
667
00:36:49,200 --> 00:36:51,700
I am the Cat.
Don't belittle me.
668
00:36:51,900 --> 00:36:53,800
Ah, yes, of course.
669
00:36:53,900 --> 00:36:56,800
Thing Two would like to
clarify that just because
he wears the number two...
670
00:36:56,900 --> 00:36:59,400
does not imply in any way
that he's inferior to Thing One.
671
00:36:59,500 --> 00:37:00,800
And all of the above.
672
00:37:00,900 --> 00:37:04,500
He says you may feel free
to call him Thing "A," if you like.
673
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:07,900
He will also accept SuperThing,
Thing King, Kid Dynamite,
674
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,700
Chocolate Thun-Da...
or Ben.
[Chuckles] Ben!
675
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:13,400
[Thing OneJabbering]
676
00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:16,400
Thing One says
he's Thing One for a reason,
677
00:37:16,500 --> 00:37:18,900
and some people
should just get used to it.
678
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:21,600
It's a Thing thing.
You wouldn't understand.
679
00:37:21,700 --> 00:37:24,100
[ThingsJabbering,
Arguing]
Okay, enough!
680
00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:26,400
You are quickly turning into
one of my least favorite Things.
681
00:37:28,100 --> 00:37:31,000
Listen, Convex,
you probably don't
wanna do that.
682
00:37:31,100 --> 00:37:33,000
Why not?
It's just a crate.
683
00:37:33,100 --> 00:37:34,500
This isn't just any old crate.
684
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:37,700
It's the Trans-dimensional
Transportolator.
685
00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:41,000
It's kinda like a doorway
which leads from this world
to my world.
686
00:37:41,100 --> 00:37:43,400
But it says,
"Made in the Philippines."
687
00:37:43,500 --> 00:37:46,700
Yes, but not this Philippines.
688
00:37:46,800 --> 00:37:51,300
Look, now,
I'm not usually a rules guy,
but this is a biggie.
689
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:53,400
No opening the crate.
690
00:37:53,500 --> 00:37:56,500
No lookee, no touchee.
Got it?
691
00:37:56,700 --> 00:37:59,700
[Thing]
Mekka-dekka we should
settle ourdifferences.
692
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:02,500
[Jabbering]
693
00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:05,500
[Cat]
Things, front and center.!
694
00:38:05,600 --> 00:38:07,400
Cool.
695
00:38:07,500 --> 00:38:11,300
All right, Things,
I'm not paying you to
stand around and look pretty.
696
00:38:11,400 --> 00:38:13,400
Here's Mom's dress.
697
00:38:13,500 --> 00:38:15,400
[Thing Cackling]
Oh.! Mommy's dress.!
698
00:38:15,500 --> 00:38:17,600
[BothJabbering, Giggling]
699
00:38:17,700 --> 00:38:19,600
- [Gasp]
- [Gasp]
700
00:38:19,700 --> 00:38:22,500
- What about the couch?
- Which couch?
701
00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:24,600
The clean one,
orthe horribly stained one?
702
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:27,500
- [Wheezing]
- [Jabbering Continues]
703
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:36,200
Ho!
[Chortling]
704
00:38:36,300 --> 00:38:38,200
Mekka-dekka
don't worry!
705
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:41,800
Incoming!
706
00:38:44,100 --> 00:38:48,800
Cat, they're wrecking
the whole house.!
707
00:38:48,900 --> 00:38:51,000
[Snoring]
708
00:38:51,100 --> 00:38:53,700
[Groans,
Continues Snoring]
709
00:38:56,300 --> 00:38:59,600
[Jabbering, Giggling Continue]
710
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:12,900
- Conrad, help!
- Help yourself!
711
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:15,900
Look at me!
Come and get it!
712
00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:18,500
[ContinuesJabbering]
713
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:25,600
[Grunts]
Whoa! Ooh, yeah! Whoa!
714
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:35,600
[Giggles]
That tickles!
715
00:39:36,900 --> 00:39:39,800
[Jabbering]
Geronimo!
716
00:39:39,900 --> 00:39:42,700
[Jabbering, Grunting]
717
00:39:42,800 --> 00:39:46,500
[Crab Lock]
Mine, mine, mine!
Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine!
718
00:39:47,900 --> 00:39:51,200
Ride 'em, cowboy!
Yee-hee-hee! Ho-ho-ho! Whee!
719
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:53,800
[Snoring]
720
00:39:56,900 --> 00:39:59,300
[Continues Snoring]
721
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,600
If this were my house,
I'd be furious.
722
00:40:01,700 --> 00:40:03,700
[Laughing]
723
00:40:08,400 --> 00:40:11,300
Hey! Klondike!
724
00:40:11,400 --> 00:40:15,100
Do you have any idea
what happened to the lock
on this crate?
725
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:17,600
- It's on Nevins's collar.
- Nevins?
726
00:40:17,700 --> 00:40:19,400
[Sally]
Nevins? Nevins.!
727
00:40:19,500 --> 00:40:23,500
Put the dog down!
I said, put the dog down!
728
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:25,500
Why won't they
listen to me?
729
00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:31,200
Oh. I don't know if this helps,
but the Things always do
the opposite of what you say.
730
00:40:31,300 --> 00:40:34,800
Why do they always
do the opposite?
That's so annoying!
731
00:40:34,900 --> 00:40:36,800
Remind you of anyone,
Conrad?
732
00:40:36,900 --> 00:40:39,500
Zinga!
[Things Cackling]
733
00:40:39,700 --> 00:40:41,600
Zinga! Zinga!
734
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:44,700
Blue! 41! Set!
Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
735
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:48,600
Hey, Thing,
don't let go of that dog!
736
00:40:48,700 --> 00:40:50,400
Let go!
737
00:40:50,500 --> 00:40:54,100
[Conrad] Catch him...
I mean, don't catch him.!
[Screams]
738
00:40:55,300 --> 00:40:56,300
[Crab Lock Chuckles]
[Barks]
739
00:40:57,300 --> 00:40:58,600
Well, this is just great, Conrad.
740
00:40:58,700 --> 00:41:02,800
The whole house is destroyed,
the party is ruined,
and now Nevins is gone.
741
00:41:02,900 --> 00:41:05,300
Sally, Kojak,
742
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:09,500
that's nothing compared
to what's gonna happen
if we don't lock this crate.
743
00:41:09,700 --> 00:41:12,600
Take a look.
It's already leaking.
744
00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:16,100
[Grunting]
745
00:41:16,300 --> 00:41:19,800
- It won't stay shut.
- Not without the lock.
746
00:41:19,900 --> 00:41:24,800
Look, if we don't get that lock off of Nevins
and put it back on this crate,
747
00:41:24,900 --> 00:41:28,700
we're gonna be staring down
the business end
of the mother of all messes.
748
00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:32,900
[Grunting]
We've gotta go out
and fiind Nevins.
749
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:35,300
[Grunts]
Impossible! Sally!
750
00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:37,800
There's only four hours
till the party.
751
00:41:37,900 --> 00:41:40,400
The Fish is right.
We should call Mom
and tell herwhat happened.
752
00:41:40,500 --> 00:41:43,700
Look at this house!
There's no way we could
explain this to Mom.
753
00:41:43,900 --> 00:41:46,500
We gotta get Nevins back
and lock the crate!
754
00:41:46,700 --> 00:41:48,600
We're staying and calling Mom.
755
00:41:48,700 --> 00:41:51,000
We're going and getting the dog.
756
00:41:51,100 --> 00:41:53,200
[Sinister Voice]
There is a third option.
757
00:41:53,300 --> 00:41:55,600
@�@�[Organ:Dramatic]
There is?
758
00:41:55,700 --> 00:41:59,100
Yes. It involves...
759
00:41:59,200 --> 00:42:01,200
murder!
@@ [Dramatic Chords]
760
00:42:01,300 --> 00:42:04,200
- That's your option?
- No.
761
00:42:04,300 --> 00:42:07,100
But you guys both had options.
I just wanted to have one too.
762
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:10,500
[Chuckling]
Or did I?
763
00:42:10,600 --> 00:42:14,400
- Cat, you're not helping!
- Come on. Let's go get that dog.
764
00:42:14,500 --> 00:42:19,000
Now, wejust need
a heavy, inanimate object
to weigh down this crate.
765
00:42:19,200 --> 00:42:21,100
[Kids Grunting]
766
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:24,800
[Grumbling]
767
00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:27,500
There. That oughta
buy us some time.
768
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:31,600
Come on, kids!
Let's go, go, go!
[Wheezing Laugh]
769
00:42:31,700 --> 00:42:35,000
[Grunting, Sighing]
770
00:42:36,100 --> 00:42:38,900
[Man On TV]
Identical sister Mitzy...
771
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:42,100
[Sighs]
[Man
That's right.
772
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:45,100
[Grunts]
773
00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:48,900
- [Knocking]
- Yeah!
774
00:42:50,700 --> 00:42:52,600
What do you want now?
775
00:42:52,700 --> 00:42:55,300
Repo.
776
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:58,600
You're repossessing my TV?
777
00:42:58,700 --> 00:43:00,100
I'm sure I made a payment.
778
00:43:00,100 --> 00:43:03,000
If it's about that bounced check,
let me give you a credit card.
779
00:43:03,100 --> 00:43:07,500
That one's expired.
Huh? Oh, come on!
780
00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:09,600
[Woman On TVGrunting]
781
00:43:09,700 --> 00:43:13,900
[Narrator]
With the lock on his collar,
Nevins kept running,
782
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,400
unaware ofhis part...
783
00:43:16,500 --> 00:43:19,000
in the evil Quinn's cunning.
[Ringing]
784
00:43:19,100 --> 00:43:22,100
Joan Walden Real Estate.
Be it ever so humble, there's no...
785
00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:23,800
Oh, hi, Joan.
786
00:43:23,900 --> 00:43:26,400
The kids let the dog
out again.
You're kidding.
787
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:30,300
Don't worry. I'll go get him,
then we'll have a conversation
vis-a-vis military school.
788
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:33,800
I don't know.
Conrad's like you, Lawrence.
789
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:36,800
He's very... sensitive.
Uh-huh.
790
00:43:36,900 --> 00:43:39,900
[Sighs]
But I suppose it's something
I should consider.
791
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:43,300
I'll get the dog.
I'll be right over.
[Dial Tone Hums]
792
00:43:45,700 --> 00:43:48,800
[Sighs]
793
00:43:48,900 --> 00:43:50,800
[Groaning]
794
00:43:50,900 --> 00:43:53,300
- [Barking]
- [Conrad]
Okay, there's Nevins.
795
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:56,800
Stay out of sight.
[Barks, Growls]
796
00:44:00,000 --> 00:44:04,100
@�@�[Violin Strings Plucking]
797
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:07,400
@@ [Plucking Continues]
798
00:44:08,900 --> 00:44:11,500
I thought the moment
needed something.
799
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:14,300
Oh, what will become of us?
800
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:16,500
Your motherwill lose her job,
801
00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:19,900
and we'll have to...
live on the street!
802
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:23,100
[Sobbing]
I can't! Don't make me go...
803
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:25,600
[Groans]
I don't know this world.!
804
00:44:25,700 --> 00:44:30,500
It's dry! It's like...
I can't... It's too...
Fish!
805
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:32,500
It's too much!
806
00:44:32,600 --> 00:44:34,600
Would you like to go back
in the toilet?
807
00:44:34,700 --> 00:44:37,200
On second thought,
it's such a beautiful day.
Why spend it indoors?
808
00:44:37,300 --> 00:44:40,000
- Thank you!
- [Gasps]
809
00:44:41,300 --> 00:44:43,200
Okay, kids.
Get out of my way.
810
00:44:43,300 --> 00:44:47,100
This fence is no match
for my cat-like grace and reflexes.
Here we go.
811
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:49,900
[Neck Muscles,
Knuckles Cracking]
[Exhales]
812
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:54,200
Ow. Okay.
Watch me fly, kids.
[Wheezing Laugh]
813
00:44:56,100 --> 00:44:59,200
[Loud Crash]
[Grunting]
814
00:44:59,300 --> 00:45:01,400
Ow!
815
00:45:01,500 --> 00:45:04,200
I don't think
the little girl's even trying.
816
00:45:04,300 --> 00:45:08,400
What about your
cat-like... reflexes?
817
00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:11,800
What about showing a little effort,
shrimp boat? Now, push!
818
00:45:11,900 --> 00:45:14,200
Whaa!
819
00:45:14,300 --> 00:45:16,500
All right, Nevins.
820
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:18,600
Time to die.
821
00:45:18,700 --> 00:45:21,800
- [Whimpering]
- Cat, you scared him away!
822
00:45:21,900 --> 00:45:23,900
Dirty hoe.
823
00:45:25,600 --> 00:45:29,500
I'm sorry, baby.
I love you. Hmm.
824
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:32,300
[Conrad]
Come on, Cat.!
825
00:45:36,100 --> 00:45:38,200
[Yipping]
There he is!
826
00:45:38,300 --> 00:45:40,200
[Children Shouting]
827
00:45:40,300 --> 00:45:42,300
[Man]
Happy birthday, Denise.
828
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:44,300
[Sally]
Denise?
829
00:45:44,500 --> 00:45:47,200
Everyone I know
is there.
830
00:45:47,300 --> 00:45:49,800
There's Ginny and Alan.
831
00:45:49,900 --> 00:45:52,800
How come Denise didn't
invite me to her birthday?
832
00:45:52,900 --> 00:45:55,500
Don't worry. Let'sjust
get Nevins and go.
833
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:56,700
- [Woman] Okay, kids.
Everyone outside.!
- [Kids Screaming]
834
00:45:58,200 --> 00:46:00,400
[Yelling]
835
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:05,300
Aaah!
836
00:46:05,400 --> 00:46:08,600
Nevins.
Cat, get down!
They're gonna see you!
837
00:46:08,700 --> 00:46:11,000
Hide.!
838
00:46:11,100 --> 00:46:13,100
[Excited Shouting]
839
00:46:19,400 --> 00:46:22,300
[Chanting]
Pi�ata! Pi�ata! Pi�ata!
840
00:46:22,400 --> 00:46:24,300
Pi�ata! Pi�ata!
841
00:46:24,400 --> 00:46:27,500
Pi�ata.! Pi�ata.!
[Nervous Grumbling]
842
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:30,200
- [Groans]
- Everybody join in!
843
00:46:35,100 --> 00:46:37,100
[Girl]
It's breaking!
844
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:40,200
Step out of my way.
845
00:46:42,700 --> 00:46:44,800
This cannot end well.
846
00:46:44,900 --> 00:46:47,800
- Pi�ata! Pi�ata!
- [Howling]
847
00:46:47,900 --> 00:46:50,000
@�I'm easy @�
848
00:46:50,100 --> 00:46:53,900
@�Ah, ah, ah, ah @�
[Whinnying]
849
00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:56,600
@�I'm easy
like Sunday morning @�@�
850
00:46:56,700 --> 00:46:59,600
- [Howling]
- [Both Groaning]
851
00:46:59,700 --> 00:47:04,200
[Howling Continues]
852
00:47:04,300 --> 00:47:06,600
Oh-ho-ho! Whoo!
853
00:47:06,700 --> 00:47:09,100
- Oh.! Whoo-hoo.!
- I got an idea.
854
00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:11,700
[Conrad]
Candy.!
855
00:47:13,300 --> 00:47:15,300
Candy!
856
00:47:16,300 --> 00:47:18,200
[Growls]
857
00:47:18,300 --> 00:47:21,000
[Both]
No!
858
00:47:21,100 --> 00:47:24,400
Get back!
Cat!
859
00:47:24,500 --> 00:47:26,500
[Cat Grunts]
I'll get you!
860
00:47:28,700 --> 00:47:30,600
[Sighs]
[Phone Rings]
861
00:47:30,700 --> 00:47:33,600
[Gasping]
I'd love to buy some.
862
00:47:33,700 --> 00:47:35,800
Hello, Mrs. Kwan.
It'sJoan Walden.
863
00:47:35,900 --> 00:47:38,400
I just called
to check on the kids.
Are they okay?
864
00:47:38,500 --> 00:47:41,500
[Chuckles]
Those aren't children.
865
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:44,500
They're little angels.
866
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:46,800
[All Laughing]
867
00:47:46,900 --> 00:47:49,200
That's sweet.
868
00:47:49,300 --> 00:47:52,200
Well, all right, Mrs. Kwan.
I'll be home as soon as I can.
869
00:47:52,300 --> 00:47:55,200
Bye-bye.
Bye.
870
00:47:55,300 --> 00:47:57,800
[Things Babbling]
871
00:47:57,900 --> 00:47:59,800
[Sighs]
872
00:48:00,900 --> 00:48:02,800
[Groans, Snores]
873
00:48:02,900 --> 00:48:06,200
[Excited Chortling]
874
00:48:23,700 --> 00:48:26,800
[Cat]
All right, soldier.
Our bogey is in range.
875
00:48:26,900 --> 00:48:29,200
Commence
search and destroy.
876
00:48:29,300 --> 00:48:32,100
- What?
- Search and rescue.
877
00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:36,600
I meant search and rescue.
Come on!
878
00:48:36,700 --> 00:48:39,700
I can't believe I wasn't
invited to that party.
879
00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:42,300
Hey!
You're a lone wolf.
880
00:48:42,400 --> 00:48:45,000
[Whispering]
Live alone, die alone.
Yeah.
881
00:48:45,100 --> 00:48:48,300
- Can we please get the dog?
- [Mocking]
Can we please get the dog?
882
00:48:48,400 --> 00:48:51,300
Can we please get the dog?
Boo!
883
00:48:54,600 --> 00:48:57,300
[Conrad]
Oh, no.! Oh, man.!
884
00:48:57,400 --> 00:49:00,300
Hello, Nevins.
Good-bye, Conrad.
885
00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:04,500
Not so tough now,
are you?
[Barks]
886
00:49:04,600 --> 00:49:07,300
[Sinister Laughing]
887
00:49:09,300 --> 00:49:11,800
[Hooting Laugh]
888
00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:16,500
We're dead.
We're never gonna get
that crate shut.
889
00:49:16,600 --> 00:49:19,900
And I'm getting shipped off
to Colonel Von Kronk's School
for Wayward Boys!
890
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:23,600
Why don't we
take my car?
You have a car?
891
00:49:23,700 --> 00:49:26,500
Yeah, sure.
[CarAlarm Chirps]
892
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:29,600
[Engine Starts,
Tires Screech]
893
00:49:30,900 --> 00:49:33,200
Wow.
That is so cool.
894
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:35,800
That's just
the dust cover.
895
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:42,000
Here she is, the Super Luxurious
Omnidirectional Whatchamajigger.
896
00:49:42,100 --> 00:49:44,700
Or S.L.O.W. For short.
897
00:49:44,800 --> 00:49:46,800
S.L.O.W.?
898
00:49:46,900 --> 00:49:50,100
Yeah, SLOW.
It's better than the last name we had.
899
00:49:50,200 --> 00:49:53,400
Super Hydraulic
Instantaneous Transporter.
900
00:49:53,500 --> 00:49:57,600
- Oh, you mean...
- Ohh! Quick, to the SLOW.
[Chortling]
901
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:02,300
[Grunts]
Buckle up, kids.
902
00:50:02,300 --> 00:50:06,400
We're on a mission to get that dog,
and we will not rest
until we fiind and destroy it.
903
00:50:06,500 --> 00:50:09,000
Rescue it!
Rescue it! Of course
I meant rescue it.
904
00:50:09,200 --> 00:50:12,500
Whatever. Remember, kids,
there's nothing faster than SLOW.
905
00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:15,700
That's backwards!
It makes no sense.
Look at you! Argh!
906
00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:18,400
Okay, here we go.
G.P. S... check.
907
00:50:18,500 --> 00:50:20,400
DVD, CD... check.
908
00:50:20,500 --> 00:50:23,500
Someone from Czechoslovakia
is a... Czech.
[Chortling]
909
00:50:23,600 --> 00:50:26,000
Siren!
What are you...
What...
910
00:50:26,100 --> 00:50:28,400
Siren?
[Screaming]
911
00:50:28,500 --> 00:50:32,300
Let's go!
912
00:50:32,500 --> 00:50:34,700
Whoo-whoa-ho-ho!
[Hooting]
913
00:50:34,900 --> 00:50:38,200
Hi there!
How are you? Yeah!
[Giggling]
914
00:50:38,300 --> 00:50:40,600
[Engine Backfiiring]
[Laughing]
915
00:50:40,700 --> 00:50:45,100
[All Yelling]
916
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:50,900
@ I'm sending Conrad away @
917
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:53,500
- Oh! Oh!
- [Barking]
918
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:56,300
[Sniffs]
Oh!
[Barks]
919
00:50:56,400 --> 00:50:59,700
I can't believe you whizzed
on my taco!
920
00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:02,300
[Barking Continues]
921
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:05,400
Wait tillJoan
gets a load of you!
922
00:51:05,500 --> 00:51:08,000
[Laughing]
[Barking]
923
00:51:08,100 --> 00:51:11,300
- There they are!
- [Fish] Red light, red light,
red light, red light.!
924
00:51:11,400 --> 00:51:13,400
Red light!
925
00:51:13,500 --> 00:51:15,900
[All Screaming]
926
00:51:18,100 --> 00:51:21,100
- Someone else should drive.
- All right. You win.
927
00:51:21,200 --> 00:51:23,700
Concrete,
you drive.
Are you serious?
928
00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:25,300
I don't know.
929
00:51:25,300 --> 00:51:29,000
A little voice inside of me
is saying, "This is a bad idea,"
930
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:31,000
but I can barely hear
that little voice...
931
00:51:31,100 --> 00:51:36,300
because an even louder
little voice is screaming,
"Let the 12-year-old drive!"
932
00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:38,200
Now, punch it!
[Imitating Engine]
933
00:51:38,300 --> 00:51:40,500
[Grunts]
934
00:51:40,600 --> 00:51:42,500
This is awesome.!
935
00:51:42,600 --> 00:51:44,400
[Gagging]
936
00:51:44,500 --> 00:51:46,900
- [Retching]
- [Groans]
937
00:51:48,900 --> 00:51:51,900
- I want to drive.
- I think that's a great idea.
938
00:51:52,100 --> 00:51:54,800
[Chuckling]
939
00:51:54,900 --> 00:51:57,900
Wait!
Two people can't drive
at the same time.
940
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:02,000
You're right.
We should all drive.
[Chortling]
941
00:52:02,100 --> 00:52:05,400
[Tires Screeching]
[Yelling]
942
00:52:05,500 --> 00:52:09,900
- Cat.! Where are the brakes?
- I'll get them.
943
00:52:12,200 --> 00:52:16,500
I think there's something wrong
with your brakes. When's the
last time you had them checked?
944
00:52:16,600 --> 00:52:19,700
[Chortling]
Bad brake.!
945
00:52:25,100 --> 00:52:26,900
[Screaming]
946
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:30,300
One-way street, one-way street,
one-way street, one-way street.!
947
00:52:30,400 --> 00:52:32,400
- [Gasping, Screaming]
- [Truck Horn Honking]
948
00:52:35,900 --> 00:52:39,300
Hey, Rhode Island license plate.
You never see those.
949
00:52:41,300 --> 00:52:44,300
[Horn Honking]
950
00:52:44,500 --> 00:52:47,000
Om. Om.
951
00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:50,400
[Loud Clanging]
952
00:52:53,700 --> 00:52:57,100
Air bag. Standard.
953
00:52:57,200 --> 00:52:59,300
[Panting]
954
00:52:59,500 --> 00:53:02,300
I think... I wet... my jar.
955
00:53:02,400 --> 00:53:04,400
Can we do that again?
956
00:53:07,100 --> 00:53:09,100
[Alarm Chirps]
[Gasps]
957
00:53:11,700 --> 00:53:13,200
Hey, there he is!
958
00:53:16,300 --> 00:53:19,000
[Conrad] Oh, no.!
He's going into Mom's offiice.!
959
00:53:19,100 --> 00:53:21,400
Come on, Cat!
960
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:24,800
[Whistles]
You know, Nevins,
961
00:53:24,900 --> 00:53:28,500
whenJoan fiinds out
you've escaped again,
Conrad will be moving out,
962
00:53:28,600 --> 00:53:30,600
and I'll be moving in.
963
00:53:33,100 --> 00:53:36,000
[Conrad] We've gotta get
Nevins and that lock back.
[Sally] What are we gonna do?
964
00:53:36,100 --> 00:53:39,300
Don't worry.
I have three plans.
965
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:42,400
Plan "A": "Mess up
a perfectly clean house."
966
00:53:42,500 --> 00:53:47,000
Done that. Plan "B":
"Cut your losses and ditch the kids."
967
00:53:47,100 --> 00:53:49,700
- That could work.
- What about that one?
968
00:53:49,800 --> 00:53:54,800
Plan "C": "Trick Mom's boyfriend
into handing over dog and lock."
969
00:53:54,900 --> 00:53:57,900
I don't know.
I still like Plan "B."
970
00:53:58,000 --> 00:54:00,700
- [Both] Cat!
- Okay, okay. Plan "C."
971
00:54:00,900 --> 00:54:02,600
Look at you. Argh!
972
00:54:04,900 --> 00:54:07,500
[Whining]
Excuse me, sir.
973
00:54:07,600 --> 00:54:10,900
I'd like you to sign
my petition. Yeah.
974
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:13,300
Get out of my way,
you hippie freak.
975
00:54:13,400 --> 00:54:16,100
Are you aware of the senseless,
wholesale slaughter...
976
00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:19,600
of the flatulating,
acid-spitting Zumzizeroo?
977
00:54:19,700 --> 00:54:22,200
What will it take
to get you out of my face?
978
00:54:22,300 --> 00:54:24,500
Just sign my petition...
979
00:54:24,700 --> 00:54:28,000
with this large, oversized pen
that requires two hands.
980
00:54:28,100 --> 00:54:30,700
I see.
[Loud Click]
981
00:54:30,800 --> 00:54:33,300
- Will you hold my dog?
- Yes!
982
00:54:33,500 --> 00:54:36,900
Okay, I have a problem
with the word "dog."
983
00:54:37,000 --> 00:54:40,300
I don't use the "D" word per se
'cause I think it's really, really wrong.
984
00:54:41,500 --> 00:54:45,000
Yeah. But I will happily
hold yourCanine-American.
985
00:54:45,100 --> 00:54:48,600
- I'm more comfortable
with that really, yeah.
- [Giggling]
986
00:54:48,700 --> 00:54:52,800
@ How much is that Canine-American
in the window @
987
00:54:52,900 --> 00:54:55,400
[Both]
Cat! Come on!
988
00:54:57,200 --> 00:54:59,700
- [Nevins Barking]
- Hey, what the...
989
00:54:59,800 --> 00:55:02,800
[Cat] Go, go, go.!
Come back here!
I'm on to you kids!
990
00:55:03,000 --> 00:55:05,800
- Nothing to see here.
Keep moving! Go!
- [Panting]
991
00:55:05,900 --> 00:55:09,000
[Whistle Blows]
Come on! Let's go.
Ah, get in, get in!
992
00:55:09,100 --> 00:55:13,200
Come on, let's go.
Get in! Hi, hi.
Get in! Get in!
993
00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:16,500
@�@�[Dance]
Look out below!
994
00:55:16,600 --> 00:55:19,800
Oh! Sorry. Over there.
995
00:55:21,500 --> 00:55:24,500
[Hooting]
Hey! Hey, hey!
Hey, hey!
996
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:27,600
[Feet Screeching]
Ohh!
997
00:55:29,900 --> 00:55:32,600
Oh!
[Laughing]
998
00:55:32,700 --> 00:55:34,300
I got you!
999
00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:39,500
Here he comes!
[Both]
Cat!
1000
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:42,000
[Yelling]
1001
00:55:42,100 --> 00:55:47,200
- [Woman Screams]
- Where's my hat? Oh! Go! Go, go!
1002
00:55:47,300 --> 00:55:49,300
Go! Let's go!
My tail, my tail.
1003
00:55:49,400 --> 00:55:53,300
Come on, Cat!
[Grunts]
I'm walking here!
1004
00:55:57,200 --> 00:56:00,000
[Angry Whimpering]
[Horn Honking]
1005
00:56:00,100 --> 00:56:03,400
Joan. Joan!
[Whimpering]
1006
00:56:05,800 --> 00:56:08,700
- I think we lost him.
- Not the pocket. Not the pocket!
1007
00:56:08,800 --> 00:56:12,700
- We got the lock back.
Now let's get home.
- Relax, kid. I'm all over it.
1008
00:56:12,900 --> 00:56:15,500
[Wheezing Laugh]
Hey.
1009
00:56:15,600 --> 00:56:17,700
What's wrong?
This.
1010
00:56:17,800 --> 00:56:20,900
This is not my hat.
I must have picked up
the wrong hat back there.
1011
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:23,500
- So?
- So...
1012
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:27,300
without my hat,
I'm just your garden-variety
six-foot-tall talking cat.
1013
00:56:27,600 --> 00:56:28,700
Joan, yourchildren
are running around town
like complete maniacs.
1014
00:56:30,900 --> 00:56:35,500
Yes, they are.
With some weird,
hairy man in a big hat.
1015
00:56:35,600 --> 00:56:37,500
Uh-huh.
1016
00:56:37,600 --> 00:56:40,800
You're gonna believe everything
I'm telling you once we get to
your house, okay? Come on.
1017
00:56:40,900 --> 00:56:42,800
We're doomed!
1018
00:56:42,900 --> 00:56:47,200
We're dead. This is all my fault.
I'm such an idiot.
1019
00:56:47,300 --> 00:56:51,500
Why do I always have to do
the opposite of what I'm supposed to?
1020
00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:53,500
Wait a second.
That's it! The opposite!
1021
00:56:53,700 --> 00:56:57,200
Hey, Things!
Don't help us!
1022
00:56:57,300 --> 00:57:00,900
Do not show up and help us
get home right now!
1023
00:57:01,000 --> 00:57:04,300
- We're goin' on a road trip!
- Larry's car?
1024
00:57:05,600 --> 00:57:08,900
How'd you get so smart?
[Chortling]
1025
00:57:09,000 --> 00:57:12,400
[Narrator]
So the race was on
to get back home fiirst.
1026
00:57:12,500 --> 00:57:15,400
[Conrad]
Hang on! We gotta beat
Mom and Quinn home!
1027
00:57:15,500 --> 00:57:19,300
[Narrator]
But back at their home,
things werejust getting worse.
1028
00:57:35,700 --> 00:57:37,500
There's Mom and Larry!
1029
00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:40,700
Step on it, Joan.
Go, go, go, go, go.
1030
00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:45,200
Oh, Things, do not do anything
to slow down my mom.
1031
00:57:45,400 --> 00:57:47,200
[Things]
Slow down Mom.!
1032
00:57:47,300 --> 00:57:50,400
[Whooping]
1033
00:57:50,500 --> 00:57:54,000
[Chattering]
1034
00:57:54,200 --> 00:57:57,200
[Quinn]
Look, Joan, they don't
beat them every day.
1035
00:57:57,300 --> 00:57:59,600
[Siren Wailing]
Oh, great.
1036
00:57:59,700 --> 00:58:03,100
[Siren Continues]
1037
00:58:04,700 --> 00:58:07,500
[Clears Throat]
I'm sorry, Offiicer.
Was I speeding?
1038
00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:11,000
Mekka dekka license,
appa registration.
1039
00:58:12,600 --> 00:58:15,200
Mekka dekka,
you're one hot mama.
1040
00:58:15,300 --> 00:58:17,900
Hey, that's my car.
Joan, we better go right away!
1041
00:58:18,100 --> 00:58:20,300
Please let me handle this.
1042
00:58:20,500 --> 00:58:22,900
Sorry, I guess I was
in a hurry to get home.
1043
00:58:23,000 --> 00:58:26,700
- I'm not gonna let them
get away with this!
- [Babbling]
1044
00:58:26,900 --> 00:58:28,600
[Yelling]
1045
00:58:28,700 --> 00:58:30,900
[Siren Wailing]
1046
00:58:32,100 --> 00:58:33,500
Meet me at the house!
1047
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:48,600
Not so fast,
you little maggots!
Ha-ha!
1048
00:58:48,700 --> 00:58:52,200
Oh, you are so busted.
Now get inside.
1049
00:58:52,300 --> 00:58:54,300
You don't want to go in there.
It's going to be a total...
Aah!
1050
00:58:56,500 --> 00:58:59,400
What?
Sally, what happened?
1051
00:58:59,500 --> 00:59:01,900
What about the mother
ofall messes?
I don't know.
1052
00:59:02,100 --> 00:59:04,700
[Sneezes]
Why am I sneezing?
1053
00:59:10,500 --> 00:59:13,200
That'd be me. Boo!
1054
00:59:13,300 --> 00:59:16,700
You're a giant...
[Sneezing]
1055
00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:18,700
Cat!
1056
00:59:18,800 --> 00:59:22,000
[Screaming]
1057
00:59:22,100 --> 00:59:25,600
Judas Priest!
1058
00:59:25,800 --> 00:59:27,800
Ooh.
Mama mia.
1059
00:59:31,900 --> 00:59:34,300
What happened
to our house?
1060
00:59:34,400 --> 00:59:37,500
It's the mother
of all messes.
Yup!
1061
00:59:37,600 --> 00:59:41,100
Pure, unadulterated fun
without any good sense or judgment.
1062
00:59:41,200 --> 00:59:43,700
See, Corn Dog,
this is why I warned you...
1063
00:59:43,800 --> 00:59:45,700
not to open the crate.
1064
00:59:45,800 --> 00:59:48,500
- [Birds Honking]
- Although, on the plus side,
1065
00:59:48,600 --> 00:59:53,300
I think people will be
talking about tonight's party
for the rest of their lives.
1066
00:59:53,400 --> 00:59:55,500
- [Nevins Whines]
- [Groans]
1067
00:59:55,600 --> 00:59:58,800
- We gotta shut the crate! Come on!
- Okay.
1068
00:59:58,900 --> 01:00:01,200
[Cat Chuckling]
1069
01:00:01,300 --> 01:00:04,400
Let's take the front hall carpet.
[Chortling]
1070
01:00:04,500 --> 01:00:08,400
- This can't be the front hall.
- This is what happens when you
mix yourworld and my world.
1071
01:00:08,600 --> 01:00:10,900
Oh, and when you eat
bad shellfiish.
1072
01:00:11,000 --> 01:00:13,600
Let's go! Oh, yeah!
1073
01:00:13,700 --> 01:00:16,500
Cat, how do we
fiind the crate?
Beats me.
1074
01:00:16,600 --> 01:00:19,700
This hat is worthless,
and it makes me look fat.
1075
01:00:19,800 --> 01:00:21,900
- Where's Mrs. Kwan?
- Oh-ho-ho!
1076
01:00:22,000 --> 01:00:25,400
Here she comes,
right on schedule.
1077
01:00:27,700 --> 01:00:31,400
- Oh, yeah!
- We're going to ride Mrs. Kwan?
1078
01:00:31,600 --> 01:00:35,200
Sure.! It's the only way
to the crate. Hop on.!
1079
01:00:35,300 --> 01:00:39,000
Oh, this is gonna be good!
1080
01:00:39,100 --> 01:00:43,000
Please keep your hands and feet
in the Kwan at all times!
1081
01:00:43,100 --> 01:00:47,200
Enjoy the ride!
[Chortling]
1082
01:00:47,300 --> 01:00:51,000
Ladies and gentlemen,
the dining room. Ohh.!
[Laughing]
1083
01:00:51,100 --> 01:00:53,400
[Sally]
This is the dining room?
[Clock Cuckooing]
1084
01:00:53,500 --> 01:00:55,700
Hey, look.
Chandelier!
1085
01:00:55,800 --> 01:00:57,700
[Chuckling]
1086
01:01:02,000 --> 01:01:05,200
[Conrad]
Is that the bathroom?
1087
01:01:05,300 --> 01:01:07,900
You might want to
hold it for a while.
1088
01:01:10,100 --> 01:01:12,000
Something like that
really burns my...
1089
01:01:12,100 --> 01:01:14,200
[All]
Aaah!
1090
01:01:16,100 --> 01:01:21,100
This is amazing!
It's like a ride
at an amusement park!
1091
01:01:21,200 --> 01:01:24,100
You mean, like at...
Universal Studios.
1092
01:01:24,200 --> 01:01:26,800
[Laughing]
Cha-ching.
1093
01:01:26,900 --> 01:01:30,600
Whoa!
1094
01:01:30,700 --> 01:01:33,300
[All Screaming]
1095
01:01:33,400 --> 01:01:36,500
- [Cat] Whoa!
- [Grumbling]
1096
01:01:36,600 --> 01:01:40,700
Please exit the Kwan to your left.
Have a nice day!
1097
01:01:40,800 --> 01:01:43,500
This is ridiculous.
I have to get home.
1098
01:01:43,600 --> 01:01:48,000
[Grunting]
Police brutality!
Illegal choke hold!
1099
01:01:49,300 --> 01:01:51,700
Where are we?
The living room,
I think.
1100
01:01:51,800 --> 01:01:54,100
Ah, man!
My eyes are closed.
1101
01:01:54,200 --> 01:01:58,700
If there's no line, could we
go back and do that again?
There's the crate!
1102
01:01:58,800 --> 01:02:00,600
Oh!
[Chortling]
1103
01:02:05,800 --> 01:02:07,800
If we shut the crate,
the house will go back to normal.
1104
01:02:07,900 --> 01:02:10,000
You have the lock?
1105
01:02:10,100 --> 01:02:12,400
Got it!
Come on! Let's go!
1106
01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:18,800
Sally!
[Both Grunting]
1107
01:02:18,900 --> 01:02:22,200
- Come on!
- It won't shut!
1108
01:02:22,300 --> 01:02:26,800
Sally! Everything
is disappearing up there!
1109
01:02:27,000 --> 01:02:29,200
- Help!
- Sally!
1110
01:02:29,300 --> 01:02:32,000
- Oh! Oh!
- Sal... Aaah!
1111
01:02:32,100 --> 01:02:34,800
- Help me, Conrad!
- Sally!
1112
01:02:36,400 --> 01:02:40,900
Help me!
I can't hold on!
1113
01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:44,500
Hang on!
Help me, Conrad!
1114
01:02:44,600 --> 01:02:47,700
Help.!
Sally, I can't reach
the lock!
1115
01:02:47,800 --> 01:02:52,000
- No!
- I can't save you
unless you let go!
1116
01:02:52,100 --> 01:02:53,900
Okay.
1117
01:02:55,000 --> 01:02:58,400
[Screaming]
Help me!
1118
01:02:59,800 --> 01:03:03,300
- [Lock] Yes!
- [Screaming]
1119
01:03:22,700 --> 01:03:27,500
[Crashing, Groaning]
[Birds Chirping]
1120
01:03:27,600 --> 01:03:31,500
[Yelling]
1121
01:03:31,600 --> 01:03:35,900
[Gurgling]
Ugh!
1122
01:03:36,000 --> 01:03:38,300
I did it!
I did it!
1123
01:03:38,400 --> 01:03:41,100
I did it.! I did it.!
I did it.!
1124
01:03:41,200 --> 01:03:43,300
[Laughing]
I did it! I did it!
1125
01:03:46,500 --> 01:03:50,300
Okay, "we" did it.
1126
01:03:50,400 --> 01:03:53,200
I don't think
we did anything.
1127
01:03:53,400 --> 01:03:57,600
The place is still a wreck.
You said if we shut the crate,
everything would be okay!
1128
01:03:57,700 --> 01:04:00,700
But it's not.
It's a complete disaster!
1129
01:04:00,800 --> 01:04:03,300
Well, what are you
gonna do?
1130
01:04:03,400 --> 01:04:05,300
Tennis, anyone?
1131
01:04:06,700 --> 01:04:08,600
[Metal Popping]
1132
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:12,800
[Balls Rolling]
[Sniffiing]
1133
01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:15,200
Ooh!
[Purring]
1134
01:04:15,300 --> 01:04:18,100
Love that new ball smell.
Yeah.
1135
01:04:18,200 --> 01:04:23,400
- Hey, your hat... it's magic again?
- Oops.
1136
01:04:23,500 --> 01:04:27,600
Well, now that the cat's out of the bag,
to use an archaic
and cruel-sounding metaphor,
1137
01:04:27,800 --> 01:04:29,700
why don't you serve fiirst?
1138
01:04:29,800 --> 01:04:32,000
You had your real hat
this whole time?
1139
01:04:32,100 --> 01:04:35,300
Uh-yup.
I planned the whole day.
[Wheezing Laugh]
1140
01:04:35,500 --> 01:04:38,900
- What do you mean,
you planned the whole day? All of it?
- Uh-yup.
1141
01:04:39,000 --> 01:04:40,400
- The house getting trashed?
- Uh-yup.
1142
01:04:40,600 --> 01:04:42,200
- Quinn taking Nevins?
- Uh-yup.
1143
01:04:42,300 --> 01:04:45,400
- Cutting off your tail?
- Uh-nope. No.
1144
01:04:46,700 --> 01:04:48,800
You even knew
I'd open the crate?
1145
01:04:48,900 --> 01:04:52,800
Why do you think I made it my one rule?
I knew you couldn't resist.
1146
01:04:52,900 --> 01:04:56,400
Now, who's up for a game
of Canadian doubles?
1147
01:04:56,500 --> 01:04:59,000
[Loud Crashing]
1148
01:04:59,200 --> 01:05:01,200
Cat, you said nothing bad
would happen.
1149
01:05:01,400 --> 01:05:04,300
Cat, you need to get out.
1150
01:05:04,500 --> 01:05:06,900
I don't know that game.
It's not a game.
1151
01:05:07,100 --> 01:05:10,200
None of this is a game!
1152
01:05:10,300 --> 01:05:14,700
- But I thought you two
wanted to have fun today.
- Look around, Cat.
1153
01:05:14,800 --> 01:05:17,500
You were right.
It's fun to have fun,
but you have to know how.
1154
01:05:17,600 --> 01:05:21,300
You don't know
when enough is enough.
Now, go!
1155
01:05:22,600 --> 01:05:24,400
Suzy.
1156
01:05:24,500 --> 01:05:26,200
Cromwell.
1157
01:05:26,300 --> 01:05:28,200
Please.
1158
01:05:28,300 --> 01:05:30,400
[Both]
Out!
1159
01:05:37,800 --> 01:05:39,100
Out!
1160
01:05:52,700 --> 01:05:54,600
[Sparking]
1161
01:05:54,700 --> 01:05:56,800
Good riddance!
1162
01:05:56,900 --> 01:05:59,700
Now, this may not be the time
for"I told you so," but...
1163
01:06:06,300 --> 01:06:08,400
Like I said,
not the time.
1164
01:06:08,500 --> 01:06:10,800
I'll get the mop
and bucket.
1165
01:06:10,900 --> 01:06:14,900
Conrad, you might want
to get out ofhere until Mom
has a chance to calm down.
1166
01:06:16,300 --> 01:06:19,900
No. This was my fault.
I'll take the blame.
1167
01:06:20,000 --> 01:06:23,400
Look, Mom will be home any second.
Why don't you go upstairs?
1168
01:06:23,500 --> 01:06:26,000
I'm not going upstairs.
I'm staying with you.
1169
01:06:26,100 --> 01:06:29,400
Really? Why?
Two reasons.
1170
01:06:29,500 --> 01:06:31,700
One, the stairs are destroyed.
1171
01:06:31,800 --> 01:06:36,600
Two, this is just as much
my fault as yours.
1172
01:06:36,700 --> 01:06:38,600
We should share the blame.
1173
01:06:39,900 --> 01:06:41,800
Thanks, Sally.
1174
01:06:41,900 --> 01:06:43,800
By the way,
1175
01:06:43,900 --> 01:06:46,300
you're a pretty good brother.
1176
01:06:46,400 --> 01:06:50,400
Glad you think that.
Maybe we can room together
at military school.
1177
01:06:54,200 --> 01:06:57,100
Well, here goes.
1178
01:07:00,700 --> 01:07:02,600
[Chortling]
1179
01:07:05,800 --> 01:07:08,800
@ Bet you thought I'd gone
Bet you felt a sting @
1180
01:07:08,800 --> 01:07:11,900
@�Bet you neverthought
I'd have anothersong to sing @�
1181
01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:14,700
@ But now that you've learned your lesson
Allow me to blow your mind @
1182
01:07:14,800 --> 01:07:17,900
@ By reading to you the small print
of the contract that you signed @@
1183
01:07:18,000 --> 01:07:21,500
Okay, section eight,
article 93, subparagraph 834.
1184
01:07:21,600 --> 01:07:23,500
Right by the chili stain.
[Chuckles]
1185
01:07:23,600 --> 01:07:27,000
It reads, "If Conrad, a.k.a. Concrete,
should open the crate...
1186
01:07:27,100 --> 01:07:30,300
"and we know he will...
the contract shall be null and void.
1187
01:07:31,800 --> 01:07:33,700
"However,
1188
01:07:33,800 --> 01:07:37,700
if Sally and Conrad
should learn from their mistakes,
the contract shall be reinstated."
1189
01:07:37,800 --> 01:07:40,800
I think you two have satisfiied
the legal burden oflearning.
1190
01:07:40,900 --> 01:07:42,700
[Both]
Yeah!
1191
01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:45,300
So there's just one last game to play.
It's called "Clean Up The House."
1192
01:07:45,400 --> 01:07:49,800
Kids, meet the Dynamic Industrial
Renovating Tractormajigger.
1193
01:07:49,900 --> 01:07:51,700
[Both]
D-l-R-T?
1194
01:07:51,800 --> 01:07:53,600
That's right!
1195
01:07:56,500 --> 01:08:00,300
[Chortling]
@�It's getting better
all the time @�
1196
01:08:00,400 --> 01:08:04,200
@�I used to get mad
at my school @�
Ta-da!
1197
01:08:04,300 --> 01:08:07,700
@� The teachers who taught me
weren't cool @�
1198
01:08:07,800 --> 01:08:09,700
@� You're holding me down @�
1199
01:08:09,800 --> 01:08:11,700
@� Turning me 'round @�
1200
01:08:11,800 --> 01:08:15,300
@�Filling me up
with your rules @�
@�Ooh-ooh @�
1201
01:08:15,400 --> 01:08:18,600
@�I've got to admit
it's getting better@�
@�Better@�
1202
01:08:18,700 --> 01:08:21,200
@�A little better
all the time @�
1203
01:08:21,300 --> 01:08:23,300
@�It can't get no worse @�
1204
01:08:23,400 --> 01:08:26,200
@�I have to admit
it's getting better@�
@�Better@�
1205
01:08:26,200 --> 01:08:29,700
@�A little better
since you've been mine @�
1206
01:08:29,800 --> 01:08:33,700
- [Cat Chortling]
- Hee-hee!
[Babbling]
1207
01:08:33,800 --> 01:08:37,400
@�Me used to be
an angry young man @�
1208
01:08:37,500 --> 01:08:40,100
@�Me hiding my head
in the sand @�
1209
01:08:40,200 --> 01:08:44,200
[Horn Honks]
@� You gave me the word
I fiinally heard @�
1210
01:08:44,300 --> 01:08:47,800
@�I'm doing the best
that I can,yeah @�
1211
01:08:47,900 --> 01:08:50,800
@�I've got to admit
it's getting better@�
1212
01:08:50,900 --> 01:08:53,500
@�Better@�
@�A little better
all the time @�
1213
01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:55,500
@�Can't get no worse @�
1214
01:08:55,600 --> 01:08:58,100
@�I have to admit
it's getting better@�
1215
01:08:58,200 --> 01:09:00,300
@�Better@�
@�It's getting better@�
1216
01:09:00,400 --> 01:09:02,800
@�Since you've been mine @�
Oh, yeah!
1217
01:09:02,900 --> 01:09:05,400
@�Getting so much better@�
These drapes are so out,
1218
01:09:05,600 --> 01:09:07,100
@�All the time @�
they're in!
1219
01:09:07,200 --> 01:09:09,600
@�It's getting better
all the time @�
[Chortling] Yeah!
1220
01:09:09,700 --> 01:09:12,900
- @�Better, better, better@�
- Spin! Spin!
1221
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:16,400
@�It's getting better
all the time @�
1222
01:09:16,500 --> 01:09:20,300
@�Better, better, better@�
1223
01:09:23,500 --> 01:09:25,400
[Blubbering]
1224
01:09:33,000 --> 01:09:35,900
[Chortling]
Ooh! Ooh!
1225
01:09:38,300 --> 01:09:43,000
@�I have to admit
it's getting better@�
1226
01:09:43,100 --> 01:09:46,100
@�A little better
all the time @�
[Barking]
1227
01:09:46,200 --> 01:09:50,300
@�It can't get no worse @�
@� Yes, I admit
it's getting better@�
1228
01:09:50,400 --> 01:09:52,400
- @�It's getting better@�
- Bye!
1229
01:09:52,500 --> 01:09:54,500
@�Since you've been mine @�
1230
01:09:54,600 --> 01:09:58,500
@�Getting so much better
all the time @�@�
1231
01:10:02,400 --> 01:10:05,300
Okay, we had some good times.
1232
01:10:05,400 --> 01:10:07,300
We cleaned up the house.
1233
01:10:07,500 --> 01:10:10,000
We even managed to work in
an up-tempo pop tune for the sound track.
1234
01:10:10,200 --> 01:10:12,100
That's important.
1235
01:10:12,200 --> 01:10:16,600
I guess there's just one
last thing to check.
1236
01:10:16,800 --> 01:10:20,100
[Gurgling]
Huh?
1237
01:10:22,800 --> 01:10:24,600
[Dings]
1238
01:10:27,400 --> 01:10:29,300
[Dings]
1239
01:10:29,400 --> 01:10:31,500
Looks like everything's
in balance,
1240
01:10:31,600 --> 01:10:33,500
but you're still smoking
way too many cigars.
1241
01:10:33,600 --> 01:10:37,500
- And you... lay offthe sauce.!
- [Chuckles]
1242
01:10:37,600 --> 01:10:39,600
Cat,
1243
01:10:39,700 --> 01:10:44,100
this day has been...
amazing.
1244
01:10:44,200 --> 01:10:46,100
Thank you, Cat.
1245
01:10:49,500 --> 01:10:52,500
For everything.
1246
01:10:54,100 --> 01:10:56,000
Conrad?
1247
01:10:57,100 --> 01:10:59,000
Sally?
1248
01:11:01,600 --> 01:11:03,500
Adieu.
1249
01:11:04,900 --> 01:11:07,400
- [Sally]
Cat.!
- Cat!
1250
01:11:07,500 --> 01:11:09,900
- Huh?
- Wait, Cat.
- Don't go!
1251
01:11:10,000 --> 01:11:11,600
[Chuckles]
1252
01:11:11,800 --> 01:11:13,900
Uh-oh!
1253
01:11:15,200 --> 01:11:17,100
[Chortling]
1254
01:11:17,200 --> 01:11:20,100
All right, kids.
This place better not be a mess.
1255
01:11:20,200 --> 01:11:22,700
I'm... home?
1256
01:11:22,800 --> 01:11:25,100
Hi, Mom.
Hi, Mom.
1257
01:11:25,200 --> 01:11:29,200
Miss Walden, home so soon?
The children were angels.
1258
01:11:29,300 --> 01:11:31,600
- Thanks, Mrs. Kwan.
- Hello, Joan.
1259
01:11:31,700 --> 01:11:34,900
[Gasps]
Lawrence, what happened to you?
1260
01:11:37,400 --> 01:11:40,000
They... happened to me.
1261
01:11:40,100 --> 01:11:43,500
Your demonic children.
1262
01:11:43,600 --> 01:11:46,600
[Panting]
They destroyed your house.!
1263
01:11:46,800 --> 01:11:49,500
Uh...
1264
01:11:49,600 --> 01:11:53,000
[Quinn]
The house was alive.
The wall was made ofpaper.
1265
01:11:53,100 --> 01:11:57,000
I fell off the cliff.
And the giant cat...
1266
01:11:59,100 --> 01:12:01,100
The giant cat!
1267
01:12:01,200 --> 01:12:03,100
[Whispers]
Tell her.
1268
01:12:03,200 --> 01:12:06,100
Larry, Larry.
1269
01:12:06,200 --> 01:12:08,500
You look terrible,
1270
01:12:08,600 --> 01:12:10,600
and my mom
thinks you're insane.
1271
01:12:10,700 --> 01:12:15,400
This is what we in sales
call "a win-win scenario."
1272
01:12:17,200 --> 01:12:19,900
Joan, you are passing up
the opportunity of a lifetime.
1273
01:12:20,000 --> 01:12:23,800
You know what kind ofkid
your boy is.
1274
01:12:23,900 --> 01:12:27,300
I mean, who are you
going to believe?
1275
01:12:27,400 --> 01:12:31,300
You're right. I do know
what kind ofkid Conrad is.
1276
01:12:31,400 --> 01:12:33,300
He can be irresponsible.
1277
01:12:33,400 --> 01:12:35,800
Yes!
He makes bad choices.
1278
01:12:35,900 --> 01:12:39,500
Sometimes he makes me
want to tear my hair out.
Yes! Yes! Yes!
1279
01:12:39,600 --> 01:12:43,200
But he's a good kid,
and I believe in him.
1280
01:12:43,300 --> 01:12:45,600
Now, I'd like you
to leave.
1281
01:12:45,800 --> 01:12:48,900
Wha... Joan. Joan.
1282
01:12:49,000 --> 01:12:52,300
Joan. Joan.
1283
01:12:52,400 --> 01:12:57,400
Oh, Joan, Joan, Joan!
[Crying]
1284
01:12:59,000 --> 01:13:01,300
[Sneezes]
1285
01:13:01,400 --> 01:13:03,000
[Groaning]
1286
01:13:05,500 --> 01:13:08,800
- Will you marry me, Joan?
- [Groans]
1287
01:13:08,900 --> 01:13:11,900
Oh, Joan, Joan,
Joan, Joan.
1288
01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:15,000
[Sobbing]
1289
01:13:15,100 --> 01:13:18,400
[Squeals]
Yes!
Yeah!
1290
01:13:18,500 --> 01:13:20,500
[Both Laughing]
[Conrad]
Yeah.!
1291
01:13:20,600 --> 01:13:25,400
Oh, that's nice.
[Snoring]
1292
01:13:25,800 --> 01:13:28,800
[People Chattering]
1293
01:13:29,000 --> 01:13:31,800
Mr. Humberfloob?
Whoa-ho-ho!
1294
01:13:31,900 --> 01:13:35,900
Almost got me again.
Enjoy the party.
1295
01:13:36,000 --> 01:13:40,200
Mr. Humberfloob.
Joan, the party's a hit
and the house is immaculate.
1296
01:13:40,300 --> 01:13:42,400
Congratulations.
1297
01:13:42,500 --> 01:13:44,800
[Woman]
Miss Walden. Uh, Miss Walden.
1298
01:13:44,900 --> 01:13:48,000
Chicka-ow, chicka-ow,
chica-yee-haw!
Hi, Mom!
1299
01:13:48,100 --> 01:13:51,300
Honey, yourcupcakes
are a huge hit.
What did you put in them?
1300
01:13:51,400 --> 01:13:54,700
Mom, you can make cupcakes
out of anything.
1301
01:13:54,800 --> 01:13:58,200
Are you telling me
you can make cupcakes
out ofanything?
1302
01:13:58,300 --> 01:14:01,900
- Anything.
- Anything?
1303
01:14:02,000 --> 01:14:04,400
So what did you kids
do today, huh?
1304
01:14:04,500 --> 01:14:08,000
[Narrator]
Well, what would you do
ifyour motherasked you?
1305
01:14:08,100 --> 01:14:11,400
The family was whole,
all thanks to the Cat,
1306
01:14:11,500 --> 01:14:14,500
who was dashing and charming,
no doubt about that.
1307
01:14:14,600 --> 01:14:16,500
He was witty and cultured...
1308
01:14:16,600 --> 01:14:18,600
and, well, very endearing...
1309
01:14:18,700 --> 01:14:20,800
and tremendously attractive,
1310
01:14:20,900 --> 01:14:23,100
but in a sort of real way.
1311
01:14:23,200 --> 01:14:26,400
You know, kind of
an approachable way that I think
you don't see these days...
1312
01:14:26,500 --> 01:14:29,400
[Normal Voice]
Oh! Hello! I was just, uh...
1313
01:14:29,500 --> 01:14:33,000
I really should be going.
[Chuckles]
1314
01:14:33,100 --> 01:14:35,400
How'd they get so smart?
1315
01:14:35,600 --> 01:14:39,900
[Whooping]
[Chortling]
1316
01:14:40,000 --> 01:14:43,100
[All Laughing]
Oh, yeah!
1317
01:14:44,200 --> 01:14:45,900
Whoo!
1318
01:14:46,900 --> 01:14:49,200
[Chortling]
1319
01:14:57,400 --> 01:14:59,300
Come on, Things!
Let's go!
1320
01:14:59,400 --> 01:15:02,800
What's on my schedule
for tomorrow?
1321
01:15:02,900 --> 01:15:05,900
What do you say
we go on vacation?
[Chortling]
1322
01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:09,800
How 'bout Hawaii?
I like Hawaii.
1323
01:15:09,900 --> 01:15:13,700
I should warn you,
there are certain places that
don't allow certain Things.
1324
01:15:13,800 --> 01:15:18,700
[Chuckling]
Oh, Things are complicated.
1325
01:15:25,300 --> 01:15:33,600
Subrip By PrimeEvil
Fixed By Pacman
1326
01:15:39,700 --> 01:15:42,900
@� Things are getting weird
Things are getting tough @�
1327
01:15:43,100 --> 01:15:46,300
@�Nothing's making sense
but you keep on looking up @�
1328
01:15:46,400 --> 01:15:49,800
@� They tell you to be true
You're trying every day @�
1329
01:15:49,900 --> 01:15:53,200
@� To keep it on the real
Still you gotta fiind a way @�
1330
01:15:53,300 --> 01:15:56,800
@� To make your mama happy
To make your papa proud @�
1331
01:15:56,900 --> 01:16:00,100
@� You wanna turn it up
but all you hear is "tone it down"@�
1332
01:16:00,200 --> 01:16:03,600
@�So gather'round
I'm here to say @�
1333
01:16:03,700 --> 01:16:07,100
@� You'll never make everybody's day @�
1334
01:16:07,200 --> 01:16:09,900
@�But while you're around
you might as well @�
1335
01:16:10,100 --> 01:16:13,000
@�Catch the tiger by its tail @�
1336
01:16:13,100 --> 01:16:15,500
@�And hang on
hang on, hang on @�
1337
01:16:15,600 --> 01:16:19,000
@�Everybodyjust get on
get on, get on @�
1338
01:16:19,100 --> 01:16:22,400
@�Get started
and go on, go on, go on @�
1339
01:16:22,500 --> 01:16:27,900
@�Everybodyjust hold on @�
1340
01:16:28,000 --> 01:16:31,600
@�Sometimes I wanna cry
orthrow the towel in @�
1341
01:16:31,700 --> 01:16:35,000
@� You try to bring me down
but I'll take it on the chin @�
1342
01:16:35,100 --> 01:16:38,600
@�And everywhere I go
the people are the same @�
1343
01:16:38,700 --> 01:16:42,000
@� Theyjust want to know
that everything will be okay @�
1344
01:16:42,200 --> 01:16:45,500
@� When things are getting rough
they turn it back around @�
1345
01:16:45,600 --> 01:16:48,900
@� You gotta turn it up
when they tell you "tone it down"@�
1346
01:16:49,000 --> 01:16:52,400
@�So gather'round
I'm here to say @�
1347
01:16:52,500 --> 01:16:55,900
@� You'll never make everybody's day @�
1348
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:58,700
@�But while you're around
you might as well @�
1349
01:16:58,800 --> 01:17:01,600
@�Catch the tiger by its tail @�
1350
01:17:01,700 --> 01:17:04,200
@�And hang on
hang on, hang on @�
1351
01:17:04,300 --> 01:17:07,500
@�Everybodyjust
get on, get on, get on @�
1352
01:17:07,600 --> 01:17:11,000
@�Get started
and go on, go on, go on @�
1353
01:17:11,100 --> 01:17:15,400
@�Everybodyjust hold on @�
1354
01:17:15,500 --> 01:17:20,400
@�Just hang on @�
1355
01:17:34,200 --> 01:17:37,500
@�So gather'round
I'm here to say @�
1356
01:17:37,600 --> 01:17:41,100
@� You'll never make everybody's day @�
1357
01:17:41,200 --> 01:17:43,900
@�But while you're around
you might as well @�
1358
01:17:44,000 --> 01:17:47,000
@�Catch a tiger by its tail @�
1359
01:17:47,100 --> 01:17:49,400
@�And hang on
hang on, hang on @�
1360
01:17:49,500 --> 01:17:52,800
@�Everybodyjust
get on, get on, get on @�
1361
01:17:52,900 --> 01:17:56,300
@�Get started
and go on, go on, go on @�
1362
01:17:56,400 --> 01:18:01,200
@�Everybodyjust hold on @�
1363
01:18:01,300 --> 01:18:03,200
@�Hang on, hang on, hang on @�
1364
01:18:03,300 --> 01:18:06,600
@�Everybodyjust
get on, get on, get on @�
1365
01:18:06,700 --> 01:18:10,100
@�Get started
and go on, go on, go on @�
1366
01:18:10,200 --> 01:18:14,500
@�Everybodyjust hold on @�
1367
01:18:14,600 --> 01:18:23,900
@�Just hang on @�@�